The Virtue of Insanity
by Mana D. Campbell
Summary: Red is an orphan, after he was adopted by a man named Mana Walker. He was happy to finally found a piece of solace. But after a faithful night, Mana was dead and in return he was found by Tyki Mikk and was brought into his family. Platonic: -Poker Pair -Neallen -Roallen. Romance -I let you reader decide do please review. As long as it isn't anyone from Black Order -Yulma
1. Chapter 1: Symphony of the Universe

Once in his early years, he would always spend his night with the sky. His childlike mind couldn't help but gleam in amazement seeing tiny dots of light hanging on the curtain of night. To frequently, the night he spent was with the presence of cold and starvation, all alone in the dusty attic he called his room. And because of that, the sky became his only consolement, he liked all the types skies but only some were his favourite.

He would wake up before the crack of dawn, when light was breaking it's way from the horizon, that sight was a medal, a reward for living another day. And at dusk, he would watch the sunset as the colors of the sky fought each other, trying to take the sky for themselves, red would win momentarily and blue would always take back the sky into it's clutches, but sometimes they would get in terms with one another and paint the sky in a lovely shade of purple. But out of all, he love the night sky, the black inky canvas that spreads his eyes could not see,-sometimes black, sometimes dark blue- and what lies in it, was a spiderweb (tangling and intermingling with one another) with the moon in the middle, it's large craters became the eyes of a large spider, and the stars that was caught in it's trap were fresh dew, like the ones after a drizzle.

He would always close his eyes in the embrace of darkness, listening to the songs of the stars. For if they have voices, surely they would sing stories of kings and servants, of knights and dragons and of princesses and stepmothers. And their story must have been interesting since they have witness the creation and destruction of mankind, of leading nation and crumbling kingdoms and spectacular events that have made humanity into this.

And just like how all the stars sing, other objects in the universe must have their own song too. And together, a galaxy was a symphony and the universe was an orchestra. For the universe will sing to those who are willing to listen.

The sky was his guardian as he was the child of the stars.

And he have prove to evaluate his existence, his left hand that most people call deformed lies a star in it, a green jewel. Sometimes it would shine in a blinding white just like the stars above, and it would always hum a faint glow. And because of that, he couldn't help but imagine that he was a fallen star or was gifted a star once upon a time or a thief that manage to stole one of the many lights in the sky. It was simply childish musing, to pass his time as boredom kept crawling onto him like a shadow.

A child is not suppose to be bored and yet here he was, starring at the night sky. Also being locked in a dusty attic that no one would dare come into, while all the others were downstairs. Laughing, playing, talking, bonding, all the thing he was not allowed to and was not supposed to do. 'Today is a celebration' The matron had told him earlier before locking the entry to the attic, 'If you act like a good boy then maybe I would give you leftover food tommorow'. And with that promise, he was alone again, the entryway to the rest of civilization cut off from him.

"You must be lonely," He said, addressing to the stars above. But if they heard it, they did not answered. The stars must be so lonely as they were too far away from each other, and because of that they are too busy reaching out for companions, for friends until they have no time to listen to the others invitation. For surely, the stars are to busy calling for the world to the point that they did not notice the world reaching towards them.

"I'll never leave you," He continued, knowing full well it would never reach them as his voice was soft and the stars are too far away. But even so, he would still continue to hear them sing even if they could not hear his, such a faithful companion he was!

His eyelids fluttered open, not realizing it was close in the first place. The night air was always cold and fresh to breathe, but now, it was amplified by the winters cold making the air around him freezing. And even so, he would not close his window so that he could get the clear view of the sky. The winter might be cold and hellish to live in without proper attire, but it's night was beautiful. It was as if the stars are competing amongst themselves, the most brightest, most beautiful. And he could not judge them, as they are all too stunning.

"Achoo," He sneezed, the noise innocently echoed throughout the whole room. He sneezed again and this time, he was force to stood up and went to his closet at the far corner of the room. Ironically, they gave him a closet but not a bed and because of that he have to sleep on the old, rotten floor. But thankfully, kind sisters had given him old cloth and clothing each season so that he could even survive the coldest winter and also make his own bed and blanket.

Who knew he could sew?

He took out a couple sheet and three shirts larger than him, he dumped the sheet onto his makeshift bed and began wearing the clothes layer per layer, it was starting to suffocate him by this point as he already wore four underneath but unfortunately the winter's night was not kind to those who dressed poorly. Then he layed back down on his bed and spread the three sheets on top of him, adding extra layers onto his blanket, he was already wearing seven. Now he was simply a little ball of cloths.

A sigh of relief escapes his mouth now that he could feel the faint presence of heat, he eagerly greeted it. His eyelids were getting far heavier the longer he tried to pry it open, and suddenly the sound of the celebration below were calming. It wasn't a surprise to hear him yawn, he took a quick glance to the sky above before everything disappeared, as if devoured by darkness. He only hope that it would not snow tonight as he didn't want to sleep in a lake tomorrow.

Oh! He forgot to say goodnight to his companions above.

* * *

 **A/N: My doctor's really angry, the sleeping pills were not working so I ate extra and maybe a bit too much. I slept through three days straight because of the overdosage. And he got mad and yelled at me because I kept doing that, (the medicine was to damn slow) and told me to wait patiently for it to settle and I gotten angry at him because he got angry at me and I threw the sleeping pills at me and we started fighting. It was a good thing he's my close relative or not I would have to find another psychiatrist, but he can be an ass sometimes. One must learn to chill, especially to their cousin who suffer from brain damage who is also their patient. But our relationship is always like that, we're similar to Sheryl and Tyki but I still don't know why he ships Yullen, it's obvious Yulma was made for each other.**

 **They're so in love with each other! I mean try reading the Kanda's ark (?) without shipping them! It's not possible, I don't mean to lower the Yullen ship but I'm just a fangirl who ships Yulma and Neallen to much so ignore me. One more thing? Is it true that Armin will die in Shingeki no Kyojin? I saw spoilers on the internet but am not too sure, I hope he doesn't die though. . .I love Armin Arlert way too much, he's my son in the OT3 and I don't want to see my psychiatrist crying. He cries way too much because of Tokyo Ghoul and other fandoms, it makes me wonder how did he became a psychiatrist in the first place?**

 **Oh yes lake,. My mother use to tell me each time I spilled water on my bed that you're going to sleep in a lake tonight, it's like an idiom back in the old days that you're sleeping in something cold and wet (also uncomfortable).**

 **-Bye! thank you for the reviews!**

Last edited: 13/6/2016


	2. Chapter 2: The Arrival of Spring

His arm reached up to cover his eyes from the bright ray of the sun, wincing as he did so. His muscles were all screaming, any movement causing it to tenses. Well he couldn't blame it, after all, he over exerted himself yesterday. He release his arms, sprawling like pinned butterfly on his bed. Red had missed the sunrise again, and he longed for to see it once more. Maybe tomorrow if he slept early without getting into trouble.

"Ah!" He screamed, shielding his eyes from the glare of the sun and slowly he blinked away the white blob in his vision. His eyes stung when he did that and he could already feel a tear rolling down his cheek.

His head was pounding, and Red began focusing on the sound it make, as if his brain was bouncing against his skull. And if so, no wonder it hurts so much. The darkness was far too tempting, now that everything was spinning, the ceiling was spinning, the floor was spinning, his body was twisting. The only safe place was the darkness, when there's nothing.

It stings, every time he move his head, it sting. As if someone stabbed a molten knife through his head, it was hot _hothot_ and strangely yet, it was also coldco _ldcold_ as if the metal is starting to cold down. It would last there for a few minutes of eternity, the strain of his vein as if it was replaced by molten lava and an iceberg.

And he could feel his body giving into the darkness, as if he was drowning in a sea of nothingness. Sinking deeper and deeper even though he was suppose to be weightless, but he was the only thing that's real there and that's why he's' going deeper. Fading into nothingness.

He was hot yet cold, an illusion yet real.

It was funny how much he wanted to live, and yet it is better to be dead. You won't worry about getting hurt anymore, feeling hunger and thirst, it would all begone once he departed from the world. And yet here was, fighting every second of his life to stay alive. The thought of dying makes him feel guilty as if he was disappointing someone. . .giving up on them. . .who was it again?

 _"I'll protect. . .your. . ."_

A hiss left his mouth as he gripped his head tightly. the pain became sharper, a hunting dagger more like a molten knife penetrating into his skull. Thousands of needles raining onto him like meteorites. There was someone knocking, but he didn't know what, it sounded like the pounding of his head so maybe it was. Who? Who? _Who?_ It resonated in his head being accompanied by a stab each.

"Shut up!" He growled and pulled his hair, causing tears to accumulate in his eyes because of the pain. "I don't care!" He shouted and dig his nails into his scalp, the familiar texture of blood flowing through his fingers and onto the floor below.

 _"Everything. . .to. . .me. . ."_

And he simply sat there, digging his nails into his scalp and almost causing it to tear open, he could taste the mixture of tears and blood in his mouth, truly a vile taste but not an unfamiliar one. "Quite," He said more softly, repeating it over and over like broken disk. In hope it could actually make the damn voice quieter.

 _"Who? Who? Who?" It ask, like the sound of crystals against each other, so pure and so innocent. "Who are you?"_

"Who?" Red ask, mildly amused before releasing the death grip on his head. His arm hanging loosely from it's socket as if both of them are paralyze. "The king of Fakes," He answered with a bittersweet smile on his face that holds no emotion. Just like everything after unravelling.

The question seemed to satisfy the voice at it dims away, echoing the world _liar_ in his minds. And he was left alone again, tears still flowing from his eyes and yet he was smiling. And not a ounce of emotions trace on his face.

The pain was still there though, but only a ghost of it's former vessel. Now there was only dull throbbing from the place he'd been stabbed by, there's no more knife, no more dagger and no more needles. Only dull throbbing and he felt nothing.

"My lord!" Someone gasped loudly, causing the attention of the child upon him. "You truly are a demon aren't you,"

He didn't answer to that question.

* * *

"Red. . ." The man in front of him sigh, Father Lucrious, before giving a glance at him. Disappointment, grief, sadness, those were the emotion that was portrayed so openly in his eyes and also something else, something malicious that he's only see in the streets.

Red scowled deeper as he tried to avoid the father's eyes, his head was now bandaged thanks to the courtesy of the one who found him. "Red, how many times must I told you! No-" Lucrious continued in a more reasonable tone.

"I did nothing wrong!" Red shouted ridiculously while at the same time giving Lucrious a look of utter disbelief. Even though the priest didn't get to finish his sentence because Red interfered but he was sure as hell he didn't do anything. After all, he was up in his room the whole day prior to HIS order last night and more importantly was locked in there with a key that was with him. He didn't eve went out to get something to eat or drink, (not like he was able to) much less do something. Except staying in his room in which did not contradict his order.

Lucrious glared at the boy,causing him to retreat back to his seat, the sudden outburst was gone, like it was never there to begin with. The priest glance at the boy's left arm before sighing, Red was the one who wanted to sigh at him and along with the rest of mankind. Lucrious look so damn tired, as if he was the one who was locked in an attic for a whole week with no food, no water, nothing. _Why!_ Lucrious seem to ask, _why did you give me this task?_

"Red, don't lie to me," Lucrious spoken softly, sounding tired, so tired and yet he did nothing. "Why did you hurt them? They were just children, Red, why?" There was something else in his tone, an unspoken question;

 _"Why do you even exist? Something so ugly, so useless. You can't even be loved,"_

Red growled, almost feral and gritted his teeth. He gripped his hands so tightly, blood trickled down from where the nails dug. "I am also a child, a human, I have my right," He answered simply, but the answer was far from normal. Children don't even answer that, even adults don't answer that. . .and yet why him? All he wanted was to be treated like a human. . .

"You can't harm any of _our_ children," Lucrious said calmly. Emphasizing the word our as if he was not one of them, to him, Red was not a child, he was not even human.

"They harmed me first!" Red retorted, giving a glare to Lucrious if he dare say otherwise. "They hit me, they accused me-" Red began his rant.

"You are not allowed to hurt anyone in this orphanage both physically and mentally, have I made myself clear?" The priest stated calmly, he eyed at the furious child in front as if he was afraid _it_ would suddenly attack.

"And why is that?" Red said ruefully, feeling as if the whole world was against him -probably was- and was sure to make his life a living hell. He was already in hell to begin with.

"Because you are a demon, Red," Lucrious stated calmly as if it was the obvious thing in the world. "You are a Demon, and if it weren't for me you would have died on that day." his eyes continues, sadness, disappointment, grief, it was all pointed at him; a mistake.

Those words hit home. Immediately his anger diminished, replacing it with the sense of grief and guilt -also a hint of shame-. After all, it was the truth- No, a fact. He have a proof: his very life was a proof that he was what the priest identified him. And he hopes for forgiveness to the one who saved him, gave him a life even if it was barely.

"I'm sorry," He apologize, bowing down his head so that he could hide his face under it's shadow. Even so, he could feel the priest eyes boring st the back of his head, as if it could read his mind and soul.

"Go," The priest said, waving is sign as the universal gesture of dismissal. "Go! You won't have any serving of food this weak. Go, I don't want to see you anymore," Tiredness was what he could detect in the old mam's voice, and even relief.

Slowly, Red went of from his chair and headed towards the door. He twisted the doorknob with much efficient before stepping through it and walked to his destination; his room, his cage, a prison. A chuckle made him stop in his track, Red turned and came face to face with his earlier problem. Though the child was covered with bandages because of their previous encounter, he did not flinch, much less cower when Red gave him sharp glare but rather smirked. Smug, arrogant, he wanted to turn that smile upside down.

"Are you going to beg for forgiveness," Coming from a mummified child it was rather hilarious, Red almost wondered if he somehow hit his head a little bit to hard.

Somehow, their interaction had drawn a crowd. Children, mostly younger than him surrounded them in a circle. Though they might be younger by age but most of them was the same and taller than Red. After all, the orphanage fed them well and sometimes he was not fed at all. Immediately, Red felt threatened, the instinct he'd nurtured in the street emerging. After all, the last time he was cornered-

Let's just leave that memory untouched.

"You are the Devil's child," One of the children - whose name he could not recall- flung at him along with a single rock that soon accompanied by the other. "You shouldn't exist to begin with,"

"Shouldn't have been born!" Another continued, along with more sets of rock.

"You are a demon," The other children continued.

Red couldn't help but feel amazed, if they would work together for a good thing, imagine how better the world would be?

"Go back to where you came from," A child; his source of misery continued, he flung a rock and it him right in the eye and the last thing he saw was red. . .black. . .he couldn't see anything anymore.

* * *

He recognize the;

angry voices.

Shouting.

Pleading.

Doors slamming, retreating footsteps.

More shouting.

How familiar it was to him, to hear them planning his demise!

"We can't go on like this!"

"He's hurting the other children-"

"He's out of control!"

Silence.

The calm before the storm.

"Call an exorcist! Hurry!"

Tensed silence.

"Father! He's possessed! Crosses appeared on his forehead-'

"I will exorcise him myself,"

Relief. Tiredness.

The footsteps began to closer.

* * *

There were times in his life that he actually found himself wondering whether or not he would actually be better of dead. One such times was his following arrival at the orphanage. At times, he thought that it would never end; the reoccurring cycle of strange rituals that was supposedly done to save his soul. Then again, it was not like he was unused to it. His life on the streets have been far more complicated, being purged, exorcise, cleansed, he was even once revered. It was already a normality to him.

That's why he didn't react, even when they drowned him in water, even when the strip him of his clothing, whipped him, bruised him and make him bleed. When it came to adults, he learned that it was better to endure it with patience.

He was already used to being defiled, while the others call it purge.

Even when he wanted to tear himself away and lashed out in anger, even when he he was intent on clawing the priest face, wanting to claw that man eyes out and return the pain that they had inflicted upon him a hundred times over, but he had learned to endure, always endurance. _"Was it not enough for them?"_ He Inwardly ask.

Fear, anger, frustration, anguish; it all melted together. _"It doesn't matter,"_ he told himself a long time ago when he was just a simple street rat. _"Just do what you have to stay alive,"_ he recalled back those events that have leave him numerous of scars, both physically and mentally.

Survival for the fittest

 _Adults are like that_. . .because of their age, their time they had spent on this world, they called themselves wise when they only ventured through their neighborhood. And because of that, their ignorance could rival the mountains, thinking that they're are never in the wronged. That's why he endured it with patient, until he too reach that stage.

After all, they thought of him as a child, and the Devil's no less.

* * *

". . .hah. . .hah. . ." It was Red, huffing as he calmed down his breathing. His heart was beating erratically against his chest like a bird trapped in a cage, trying to get out. He was in a cage and he wanted to get out!

 _"You promised. . .promised. . .promise," The voice whispered, sounding strangely calming_

He curses inwardly as he closed his eyes to ease his pounding head. Like daggersknif _eneddles_ penetrating into his skull over and over. Someone was pouring burning ice into his vein, it spread throughout his whole body, cooling/warming it. _If they want to throw me back into the attic at least do it properly_ , he thought as he opened his eyes and used his hands to drag him across the room and to his bed. His comfy and soft bed.

 _"I promise. . .beloved. . .love," It echoed, soothing his tired mind and battered soul._

A sigh of relief escapes his mouth as he turned his body towards the window and gathered the cloths around him. Wrapping him up like a ball of cloth, he was a ball of cloths by this point. It was almost spring and the breeze was just nice and cool, especially with the wounds that littered his body. The cold air was just nice against his face and relaxing. . .

The darkness was also inviting, beckoning and embracing him like a mother's hug. Oh! How he earned his well need sleep. At the corner of his mind, he heard a soft lullaby playing being lost in the winds.

If only he could also disappear.

 _"My dearest beloved, you are loved," The darkness seemed to tell as it rocked the sleeping child in it's embrace._

* * *

 **This chapter was very hard to edit, at least, that's what my sleepy mind is telling. The headache that Red gets is kinda an example of mine, well mine doesn't ask question and riddles but mostly anime songs and piano pieces. . .well sometimes they do like 'Your homework. . .due tommorow. . .three reports. . .two essays. . .twelve question. . .' 'Stop procrastinating!'.**

 **Thank you to Badlydrawnunnicorntyki for making me making me obsess with exorcist tyki, tyki x sheryl, tyki x judgement, and also master tyki (allen) I need fics about General Tyki and his apprentice Allen, also stalker noah!Cross along with brother Sheryl. Why is there none actually? Just imagine all the shenanigans there would be?**

 **=-Okay bye, the words are stating to make me barf. It's swirling everywhere./c 12/6**


	3. Chapter 3: The Seeds of Fate

"'Be useful for once' he said," Red grunted as he tried to mimic the matron's awful voice.

 _Give the work that requires the most energy to a deformed orphan,_ they thought.

For once, Red hated freedom as he shoveled the snow and threw it into a pile. Why? You ask- It was the early spring and there are still plenty of snow blanketing the ground. And so, the job of clearing their yard was given to a deformed, malnourished orphan. _I thought I was a demon,_ he thought bitterly. _Demons are not suppose to roam around freely!_. And as far as he was concerned, demons and monsters are suppose to be locked away in someplace where they couldn't cause mayhem. And yet here he was, shovelling snow on the orphanage's yard.

At least the current weather is cold, his shirt won't be soaked by sweat but it would still smell awfu-

"Hey, freak. . .'

He averted his eyes and mentally sigh.

 _What now. . ._

"Hey, look at me when I'm talking to you, freak!"

 _All he wanted to do was shovel the goddam snow while contemplating the destruction of humaniity! Was it so much to ask?_

A hand grabbed onto his collar, hoisting him up from his ground -he was light and malnourished, what did you expect?-. Allen gave the one responsible a deadly glare. Through his narrow eyes, he expresses a very clear message to the one before him. _Let go of me or you' regret your very existence._

The other's eyes widened a bit, as though the phrase had been spoken out loud and not been conveyed telepathically through his eyes. Ironically, the grip on his collar tightened. "You cannot scare me, you abomination. . ." The other growled as his comrade were discreetly cheering for him. "I'm going to make you pay for that trick you pulled on others. . ."

Red's faced remained neutral -bored perhaps- but inwardly he smirked.

Revenge, huh? He'd just now what to do. The grip of his right hand tightened as it took a greater hold on the shovel but soon slacken as he remember his tormenter previous message. _"Do not harm any of the orphanage children both physically or mentally. . ."_

Mentally he sigh, this is soo going to hurt later.

"You shouldn't be fighting," A voice from behind spoken. The grip on his collar loosen making Red plummeting to the ground, he winced as he slowly steadied himself onto his feet. Eyeing questioningly at the stranger -or his saviour- who had interrupted them.

The child who was also his tormenter, the cause of his problem, the source of his pain, choose whichever you want, went red as he points a finger angrily at Red, who was at that time rubbing his sour back. "He's a demon. I'm just punishing him,"He hissed as if that statement alone was the answer,

The look of confusion on the older's face seems to disagree, Red would've erupted into fits of laughter if his back wasn't still throbbing. Weirdly, the man faced seems to lit as he saw Red, the corner of his lips twist into an amusing smile and his eyes glinted happily, along with something else; something tired and broken.

* * *

Red hummed as he tried to sort out his piece of clothing, picking the most durable and the most wearable one. To put it simply, he's picking the one that still looks like clothes and not some random rags he found in the dustbin. Which he did, by the way.

And why? Most of you will certainly question, this is because he was going to be under some random stranger protection besides the orphanage. In another word, he's going to be adopted but he was sure as hell that it won't even last a month, a weak was his longest guess, so that's why he's picking his clothing to wear until it hits the time limits.

He was sure he seen some shirt here-

"Gah!" He shouted in frustration, tossing the clothing back into it's pile. That's it, if he's going to be some random guy responsibility he's going to make sure that guy get him some clothes.

Grumbling, Red stalked to the door and pulled it open. He climbed down the ladder and pulled down the door before giving his room a final glance. Going down the stairs with only one arm was a pain, going down the ladder with only one usable arm was hell. That's why, when one of it's gripper suddenly broke under his weight and cause him to fall down due to the fact that he could only use one arm. He was pissed of by this point, the next person he'll meet would surely be blessed by his sudden anger.

The other children, he noted, preed curiously from their doorway, after all it was not everyday he walked through this hall in daylight.

Upon seeing his soon-to-be guardian at the entryway of the orphanage, Red mentally cringe. That man might look kind on the outside, but he knew by experience that adult had worn different masks to get what they wanted, and he was no exception.

"I sorted it out with the Father," The man said, smiling down at Red. He extended one of his hand to the child and beckoned him to take it. "Come on, Red, we have places to go,"

Though reluctantly, Red took his hand and together they walked side by side. "Where are we going?" He ask, his virgin curiosity fleeting. After all, he was still child and so little places he'd went before.

The grip of his hand tightened as they started venturing into the town, but since the air was still cold and chilly, only few ventured outside. "Places, Red, the world is so big for us to explore," He chuckled, his voice sounded like honey.

"Like where?" He could't stop himself from questioning, and the excitement in his tone of voice was also detectable.

The man pondered for a few moment before finally founded his answer. "There's Europe And the building there are amazing, there's also Italy and the food there is heavenly-"

"Really?" Red questioned, his array of food was usually bread past it's expiring date.

"Pasta, pizza. . .you name it!"

"Are we going there?"

The man laugh, wiping a fake tear from his eyes as he glance at the child at the corner of his eyes. "You ask many question, Red," He said as his pace quickens, the child though, had no qualms about matching his speed.

"We're going to see the whole world,"

Just the two of us, you and me.

* * *

 **HAHAHAH! I don't know how to edit chapters. Though thanks for reading this, and I really hope you review. Bye!**

Last edted: 1/7/2016


	4. Chapter 4: Interwoven Tragedy

Mana was his world, his everything. To him, Mana was the sun, the moon and the dots of lights in the night sky. While he was the Earth, his life seems to rotate around Mana.

As long as Mana was happy then he would also be happy. If Mana was sad then he would make sure a smile would lit upon his face. And too, Mana was also like that.

it was also funny how acts of kindness can break the barrier of he that have been discarded by the world. Someone who was labelled as trash, unneeded, filth. And indeed, it was laughable knowing that he became attached just after a few months, a few short months.

"Say, Red. . ." The older man deadpanned as he tugs the child's hand harder. "I have something about your name," He said out of the blue.

"What about it?" Red ask, feeling rather surprise at the sudden random question. They both slowed down their paces as they were now distracted by their talk.

"It doesn't describe you that well," Mana remarked simply, putting on a grin as he stares down at the child besides him. He was always smiling, always happy.

Red, still puzzled, looked at the older man as if he grown a second head. After all, it had been month since they travelled together and there had never have any problems regarding with his name. "Then what does?" He ask, not expecting any answer from his guardian.

Mana pondered for a few moments, they abruptly stop as he bends down onto his knees so they were on the same level. "Allen," He answered, golden eyes boring into the silver one expectedly, eagerly, like a child on Christmas Eve. "How about it?"

The child thought about it for a few moments and finally. "Allen," He repeated, it felt foreign on his tongue and yet strangely familiar, so familiar as if it was a piece that have always existed, but not acknowledge. The older man chuckled while slowly standing up from his crouching position.

"Allen. Al-len. A-llen." The boy tried, using different pronunciation to produce his new name. Because somehow, it felt wrong- sounded wrong, his heart was not content until he get it wright. Listening the child repeating his name, the older man smiled amusedly, he extended a hand towards his younger charge and the child took it and together they continue their journey.

"All-en," The child said again. His heart burning with discontent, not sattisfied.

The man chuckled, observing the child from the corner of his eyes. "Repeat after me; Al-len," He ordered.

"Al-len," The child did as he told, carefully repeating those pronounciation. And somehow the fire diminshed, though not all. There's something still not correct here, something wrong.

The man chuckled again, his other hand flew to the child's crown and ruffled it. Immediately, it was swatted away by the owner of the hair. Who in return, crossed his hand over his chest and glared at the older man.

"You're so cute, Allen," He commented, fondness evident in his tone.

"Hmph," The child pouted as he averted his eyes to hide his slightly tinted cheek.

After a while, the hand returned back to it's hold in the older's grip. As their pace accelerated, he grips it more tighter in fear of being lost in the crowd. And yet, it felt as if he was grasping the winds.

"I'm not cute," By that, he earned himself a chuckle and he too smiled.

He was the earth and Mana was the very sky.

* * *

Allen gasped for air, he stops in his track as he quickly fills his lungs with oxygen. Across him, Mana too was huffing for air as he gives Allen a sly smile. Like always, he extended a hand to Allen and immediately the child took it. They walked pass the compartments and towards their seat.

Allen immediately ran to claim his own, and like always, besides the window. It took a lot of Mana's energy to force Allen sit properly, at least, until the train finally departs.

"I'm hungry," He whined, shaking the arms of his guardian as a notification he need something to satisfy his hunger.

Mana put his bag on his lap, a hand went in it and instantly it found what it'd been looking for. He dangled the sweet treats in his hands and wave it in front of Allen's face. The child eyes immediately lit up at the site of something sweet. Instantly, he snatched it from it's owner and opened it's wrapping. He found himself sucking the sweets the next second.

"What are you suppose to say, Allen?" The man question, he unwrapped the sweet from it's wrapper for him to eat.

"Thank you, Mana," Was what the child said, but it was debatable as it was too slurred to make any words from it.

The man chuckled, putting the candy in his mouth and instantly slumped into his seat. A sigh left his mouth as he closed his eyes. The child eyes never left it's gaze on the man and when it was conformed that he was sleeping he put his elbow on the windowsill, placing his head on his head and too went into slight slumber.

What felt like seconds later, he was shook away. And annoyed moan left his mouth as he glared at the culprit who had interrupted his well need sleep. The man chuckled as he handed the child's jacket, still smiling amusedly at the child.

"This is our stop," He stated as he pointed outside the window, a station still far from here but is visible.

Not to drag things later, Allen took the jacket and wore it, needing assistance as his paralyzed left arm couldn't went through the hole without the help of a third party. It must have look amusing since passenger from behind them snickered at the sight. His cheek went red slightly but he blamed it on the cold. It was in the middle of Autumn after all.

The train slowed down abruptly, causing the child standing on the seat to fall down. He was thankful there there was cushion to support his fall but it did not lessen the pain that accompanied due to the sudden stress his back felt.

"Ouch!" He hissed, rubbing his sour back tenderly.

The train finally stop, Mana stood up and sling their baggage over his shoulder. He dusted himself and extend a hand towards the child who took it gratefully and jumped from his seat. A whistle rang from the train, signaling that it's finally safe to exit it. Many still sat on their sit since this station are not their destination and because of that, they did not have to wade between the sea of people like they usually do.

As they finally sat foot off the train, Allen finally ask. "Why are we here?" He looked expectantly at the older man, curiosity filled his mind.

"I will tell you once we arrive at our destination," Mana replied.

The child frown, not satisfied with the answer. After all, question should be answered immediately, but if Mana says so . . .

"Promise?" He ask again, tugging the older man's hand a bit.

The man smiled and looked down at him. "Promise," He agreed.

Allen learned a _long_ time ago, that promise should never be broken.

* * *

Mana hummed slightly as he starred at the road that lies ahead. Not far from here, a mixture of grey and black cloud rolled and from time to time it would crackled white of pure energy. And a gust of wind blew from the north, he pulled his jacket tighter around his body and shivered. Besides him, the child sneezed.

"Do you need some tissue?" He ask, starring at the child wearily.

Allen sniffled, contemplating on the question before he answered. "No,' He decided, rubbing his nose with his sleeve. "Are we there yet," He ask, voice sound a little hoarse.

"No," The man replied, staring at what lays ahead. "In a few hours, if memories serves correct,"

As far as Allen's was concerned, Mana's memories wasn't always spot on(In fact, it never was). But it was better than wandering aimlessly even though it's what they had been doing for the past months before Mana had decided that they should go here. Why did he want to go here in fact? Mana promise to answer once they arrive but. . .

"Mana. . ." He called but stopped once he saw the man's faces. Mana looked happy, in fact he looked ecstasy as he stares of ahead, even when there was a storm ahead.

In the end, he decided to be patient.

Mana stopped humming as the first few drops of rain hit them. They immediately ran to the nearest shelter that they could find, which was a cafe. The waiter greeted them and showed them to their seat, along with a few menus, in which Allen declined since it wouldn't help him at all in his current situation.(He can't read such elegant words yet) Mana looked over through the few delicacies that they have issued on their menu.

After a couple of heartbeats, he closed the menu and handed it over to the waiter. "English breakfast," He decided.

"Me too," The child suddenly shot up.

Mana chuckled, his attention diverted back to the waiter. "Make that two,"

"Will that be all?" The waiter question, jotting down their order on a piece of paper. Mana nodded and the waiter left.

Allen hummed a simple tune to himself, fiddling with the napkin of the table. Although it seems that his attention was on the piece of cloth in his hands, in fact, it was on the man across him. He wondered if other people would thought of them as a family, not maybe. Since their traits did not match as father as son; Allen had mahogany hair as Mana's was light black, Allen have mercury eyes while Mana was the colour of amber and he was ghostly pale while Mana was the healthy colour of. In fact, they were the exact opposites, besides. . .

'Family' was a word he had thrown away in the past when it had lost the meaning for him a long time ago. He was not an emotional person, nor did he particularly care to have one, infact, he was too prideful to even acknowledge someone as such. He would not say that Mana were the first thing that come to his mind, because it would be painful for all parties that way. But Mana was. . .

"Here you go," the waiter said as she dropped to cups of tea at each of them meticulously, not even spilling a drop. Mana blowed the warm liquid slowly before taking a short sip and put it back on the table. Allen did the same though it might be a tad too hot for him. But in the end, they enjoyed it like how other Englishmen would do.

It was hot, and the outside was cold, almost below the freezing point. So in children's term, it was perfect, though a little bland for his liking. The waiter returned, bringing a plate of scones along with them. Mana rejected it, saying that he didn't ordered anything aside from the beverage. The waiter fought back, saying that the owner of the cafe (who was her grandmother) had baked freshly dessert and wanted to share it with the rest of her customers. Allen looked around the shop, and indeed, almost all the table that was inhabitant have a wild array of pastries on top of them. Some had cookies, others had tarts, a couple was sharing danish and others was unidentifiable to him.

Mana sigh and accepted the scones, thanking the waiter so she could fulfill the needs of other customers. He took one and broke it in half, giving it to the child across him, who took it quite eagerly. In seconds, the pastries have been completely inhaled by the child.

"Hello, there," A voice greeted them suddenly, causing Allen to jump in his seat. Allen turned back, an old crone, wearing mittens and holding a metallic plate smiled at him. "I went out to see what my grand-daughter was fussing about and it turned out to be a child. Aren't you cute?"

Immediately, almost instinctively, a hand crossed his chest, glaring at the woman while through his narrow eyes, judging her if she could be some sort of enemy. "I'm not cute," He defended, his lips tug into a scowl.

The women put the plate on top of their table,removing her mittens just so she could be pinch his cheek and pull it. "It's illegal to be this cute," She said and finally let go of her death grip on his cheek.

Immediately Allen went red, he averted his gaze so they won't see his blushing face. "Am not," He tried to defend the last bit of his dignity.

The woman laugh, her hand went to her back and suddenly revealed a six inches long knive. Allen panicked, looking back and forth between Mana and the women, but Mana was not reacting, he looked like he was in a daze, smiling like an idiot and all that. The knife went closer and closer, Allen screwed his eyes, expecting for the worst.

"Here," Reality crashed upon him as he opened back his eyes, the cafe erupted into fits of laughter seeing the surprised looked on his face. Allen burrowed his face in his hands in embarrassment, there goes his dignity.

"Here," The old croned said again and Allen finally notice what she'd been holding in her hand. A plate and on top of it was. . .A cake? but it have apple inside. . .Tart? A giant danish?

"What is it?" He ask, feeling a bit stupid when that question left his mouth.

"A pie." She answered. Well, whatever it was, it smelled good.

"Do you like tarts?" She ask and Allen nodded to her question, Allen loved all kinds of food, that includes desserts and vegetables. In which, the later most children hates.

"This is a giant tart," She stated, sliding down the plate towards him, along with a fork jutting out from it.

Allen eyed at it and then towards his foster father who was already enjoying his own piece. He cutted a forkful and put it inside his mouth. To say it was delicious was an understatement, in fact, it was heavenly. He felt himself melting to his seat with just one bite.

"It's delicious," He said exasperated, it tasted amazing, Allen never had something as delicious as this.

The women chuckled and ruffled his hair, making it more messier then it was before. "You could always come if you want some more. Cute children are welcomed any time,"

The old woman wore her mittens and grabbed the metallic plate. She went on to each inhabited table and give each person a slice of pie, each of them thanked her before she drifted to another table.

"Allen?" His guardian called.

"Uh," Was his reply as Allen was to busy stuffing his face with pie. Mana chuckled as he grabbed his napkin, crossing the table so he could wipe Allen face with man went back to his seat and finished his last fork of pie, before drowning it down with tea. And amused smile plastered on his face as he continued to watch Allen ate his pie, until finally he came down to the last bite.

"Finnish your tea, Allen," Mana reminded, seeing Allen have some tea left in his mug. "Drink it slowly,"

Allen nodded, chewing thoroughly of the pie before swallowing it. His hand went to get the mug by it's handle and the ring of the mug went to his mouth. Allen chugged down slowly as the tea is still hot but not hot enough to make it unbearable. To him, the bland tea went perfectly fine with the sweets he just ate.

"Come," Mana called as he slung his jacket around him, Allen obliged as he spread his arm wide so Mana could help him where his coat. With his help, Allen was ready to go against the current weather. Mana put some shillings on the table before tacking Allen's hands and exited the cafe.

They continue back their journey, to a destination that Allen doesn't know.

* * *

It was past a hour since their last unexpected stop and Allen still doesn't feel tired. Which was surprising since he usually felt tired after walking this long, maybe because it was the amount of sugar that he had consumed earlier. Or maybe, he was tired but his mind refuse to accept that fact since it have grown use to it. Allen choose the first one, seeing the latter was sensible but he doesn't have any evidence to support that theory.

"Can we go there again, next time?" He ask while squinting through the fog that have blanketed the street as an affect after the rain.

Allen felt Mana shifted, gripping his hand more tightly as they continued. He doesn't answer the question and Allen doesn't want to push.

* * *

 **I didn't know editing could be this hard!**

Last Edited: 2/7/2016


	5. Chapter 5: From Where Destruction Sprout

**There are no happy endings.**

 **Endings are the saddest part,**

 **So give me a happy middle**

 **And a very happy start.**

 **-Shel Silverstein**

* * *

Judging by how Allen's legs ached with each step he took, he was tired. The food he ate hours before was already digest and he felt cold and starve. Allen turned his attention towards Mana, who was humming excitedly and occasionally skipped.

A burst of wind blew against him, like a whip, making him stop in his track. It was so damn cold and it's not even winter yet! How can it be so? He shivered, then sneezes, drawing the coat tighter around his body.

He opened his eyes, which he didn't realize was close and simple starred in disbelief, a wave fear washed through him and finally he react. Mana, his guardian, was a good few yards ahead of him, leaving the poor child at the back.

"Mana!" He called, sprinting as fast as his short leg could, his joint burned because of his sudden burst, and suddenly, it felt like he was running uphill. Allen felt breathless as Mana's figure was getting closer but still far away. "Mana!" He called again, hopping that his cry would be heard, and thankfully it did. Mana turned around, suddenly confused why his foster son wasn't besides him.

With the last bit of energy, Allen accelerate, his muscles crying in pain as he did so. Thankfully, Mana walked towards him, reducing their distance drastically and as he was near Mana, Allen let his knees collapse.

"Hah. . .Hah. . ." He huffed, gulping down large quantity of air. He felt his very blood cell crying out in pain, demanding oxygen and he was happy to give them. He slowed down his breathing, trying to calm down his heart, Allen tried to stood up slowly but soon found out that he had exhausted the use of his leg.

"Are you tired, Allen," A voice spoke out in concern, Allen simply nodded, just like every other part of his body, his throat burns. Mana went into a crouching position, gently he carried Allen and swung him onto his back. Making sure that the child is safely on top of him, Mana continued back their journey.

Allen sigh, burrowing himself into Mana's back as he makes sure that his arm is safely secure around Mana's neck. Exhaustion crept up to him like a ghost and he felt his eyelids growing heavier. He moaned, balancing his head onto Mana's shoulder and yawned. The man chuckled, if Mana was tired he didn't show it. "Are you tired, Allen?"He ask, amusement underlying his tone.

"Yeah. . ." Allen replied, Mana's back felt so comfy and safe, he doesn't want to let go. "Can you sing for me, Mana?"

That question seems to caught the man by surprised, probably a jab to his dignity though. "Sing what?" He ask as he wonders.

"The one you hummed all the time," Was his reply from the tired child, Mana pondered for a moment before he agreed.

 _"So the child went into a deep sleep._

 _Among the grey ashes in the flames shining. . .First one, then two . . ._

 _Surfaces numerous of your faces._ _"_

It was soothing. . .calming. . .It was sung so passionately that Allen began to wonder, had he heard this before? He have a distant memory of cold winter night, singing to himself and the stars. Just him and the night sky.

 _"A thousand dreams trickle back to the earth,_

 _On the night when the silver eyes were trembling , the shining you was born._

 _Across millions of years, the prayers have already returned back to the earth._ _"_

Just when he thought the memory was within his grasp it disappeared through his finger and vanished into thin air. Allen felt himself being frustrated but immediately calmed down afterwards; it was just a song after all, there's no need to pour thoughts into it.

 _"I will still continue to pray,_

 _Please bestow upon this child your love,_

 _Upon our joined hands, leave a gentle kiss._ _"_

But. . .Mana was singing it so passionately as if there's another meaning into that song. The one that he doesn't know, and would probably never understand. But he wants to, he wants to see the world through Mana's eyes, understanding it with his knowledge. . .But . . .

 _"So the little infant fell into a deep sleep._

 _Among the grey ashes in the flames shining. . .First one,then two . . ._

 _Surfaces numerous of your faces._ _"_

For now. . . he was simply a child. A tired child who had seen the whole in all it's different angles. In it's all different shade of gray. . .and he was exhausted.

 _"A thousand dreams trickle back to the earth,_

 _On the night when the silver eyes were trembling , the shining you was born._

 _Across millions of years, the prayers have already returned back to the earth._ _"_

The song, Allen realized, was sung in a different language, (it was always like that) one that he doesn't know and yet he still understand the meaning behind it. How. . . but he was tired, so damn tired, he feels like he wants to cry. He wants to be like a child for once; act like one and be like one. But he can't, the world has speed up his experience, making him more like an adult already.

 _"I will still continue to pray._

 _Please bestow upon this child your love,_

 _Upon our joined hands, leave a gentle kiss._ _"_

The song, Allen thought, he _wants_ to be like the child in this song. . .

 _"I will still continue to pray._

 _Please bestow upon this child your love,_

 _Upon our joined hands, leave a gentle kiss._ _"_

Mana was singing it so passionately, Allen wondered for _whom_ was he singing for?

* * *

For once, Allen wondered, how did he get into this kind situation? It was starting to get worriying that he atracted misery and bad luk from five miles radius. His head was throbbing heavily and his eyelids felt like lead, plus the darkness didn't help. In fact, it seems to further fuel his headache. Across him seems to be the only source of light in this abyss, the candle flickered from time to time, making the room an arena for light and sadow, where they fought to overpoewer one another.

Allen moved his legs in order to stand up but found out almost immediately, it was tied together by a rope. He then, tried to move his hand and also, it was bound. Allen felt terror unlike he ever did before, he searched frantically the whole room, trying to find a single sign of life, or more specifically, his foster father.

"Mana!" He shouted, the name echoed in the closed space, repeating over and over like a broken disk. "Mana!" He shouted again, this time more desperate.

Footsteps appeared, coming more closer and closer, to the point he found himself backing against the wall. -What seems like- The door screeched softly, and through it came a single figure who Allen instantly recognize; Mana. He sigh in relief, tears threatening to fall as his guardian steps closer to him. "Mana-" He sobbed but was cut by the man himself.

"Do you love me, Allen?" He question, the voice was as soft as a whisper, suspended in the air.

Allen didn't know what to answer. 'Love' seems like a strong word for someone like him, besides. . .does this feeling counts as love? An obsession more likely. As Mana was the only person who had showered him like kindness and treated him like a human being. In which, the latter most people failed miserably at. Allen didn't know what to answer so he remained silent, but Mana took that as one.

The man frowned, taking a step closer to the bound child. Relief turned into fear and it multiply tenfolds with panic.

"I want us to be together," Mana said, a sad smiled grazing his soft features as he took another step closer. His eyes holding a sense of saness in them, while holding flecks of madness. The insanity that use to occupy Mana's eyes just a week ago.

Allen backed into the wall and pushed his leg harder and harder, he suddenly wished that he had the ability to melt into a wall or somehow become one with them. Allen screwed his eyes shut, silence hung in the air as it anticipated the next move.

"I love you," He opened his eyes, those words also wanted to leave his mouth but it got stuck as he starred at the man who he once deemed as a father. Still does, always have ad always will.

Mana was smiling so sweetly, his eyes looked soft as he held differents kind of emotion all at once; Happy, sad, guilt and something more, much more; too much, Mana was feeling too much until tears were running down his face. Above his head, Allen finally noticed, was a long knife, held between his hands, looking so innocent at one momment. It's surface glinting and gleaming as if it was anticipating for blood to be drawn.

But Allen was to busy looking at Mana smiling at him. Too busy outlining his feature, the wrinkle around his eyes not from age but from smiling too much, he was too busy drinking the image of Mana and how he seem to look past him. Mana was loking at him but not him, he on the other hand was always looking at Mana. Looking after him, guiding him each time Mana seem to lost it (He was forgetful after all)

At one time, it was simply for paying back the nimber oftimes Mana had taken care of him. The next one, it became his responsibility.

Was he crying? Allen guess so as he felt his cheeks being wet and it suddenly became so hard to even open his eyes. The images were blurred together but still, he could only trace the faint outline of Mana's figure.

Mana was smiling at him and he too smiled at Mana

"I love you, too,"

It might as well not be love but it was close enough to be so.

Allen was sure of that, with time, his obsession will surely blossom into love. That's why he still want to be together with Mana.

Just the two of them.

Yes, a week ago he'd promise that.

 _"I'll never leave your side Mana, so don't worr. You'll never be alone."_

* * *

Red. . .

What a sight?

The colour of _passion_ , the colour of love, the colour of hate.

The colour of fire.

Oh! How everythings seemed to be burned by that colour? That _wretched_ colour,

Oh! How he _hates_ that colour?

And yet, _loves_ it at the same time.

What a _twisted_ sentiment it was?

To love and hate the same thing.

Or maybe he was the _wretched_ one here?

That's why he can't seem to hate it.

* * *

He was so tired, so tired to even live. Mana. . .his salvation. . .his obsession. . .was taken away. . .

So why not he just give up. . .there's nothing to live anymore.

He was too busy dying to notice the approaching footsteps.

"Hey, boy!" Allen continued to ignore him, to busy lying on a puddle of his own blood with destruction and chaos all around him. "Do you know the person named, Mana Walker?"

At the sound of Mana's name being mentioned, he immediately gaze up. Trying to find the source of the damned voice that reminded him of his lost.

 _Gold_

It was sharp and feral, also giving some sort impression of being wild. Yet he felt drawn to it,recognition, he found a home in it but it wasn't his. Yet. . .

 _Amber_

it was just like Mana's, the hearth of a flame. But Mana's was warmer, it was his home.

His head slumped back, he denied the answer and returned back to what he was doing before. Lying in a puddle of blood, destruction all around him as he tried to sleep for eternity. He wanted death.

But instead, the footsteps came closer and a hand swiped his forehead. Allen wanted to open his eyes and see what the stranger was doing, but instead he remained calm. Waiting for darkness to come and indeed it came, but not in the one he'd wanted.

"Oh, I see," The voice sound amused, along with something else, something he couldn't hope to comprehend. It faded away, along with his conscious.

* * *

He was in the world of black and white,

A grinning moon ripped the sky, along with stars that dotted it.

Dead, hollow trees clumped together as a forest. Surrounding him from all sides. It's branch twisted upwards, like hands in a prayer, reaching for the heavens.

There was a lake here, in the middle of this clearing. It's surface gleaming, Allen starred at it's murky water. Though it seemed calm, he noticed underneath the surface was like a raging ocean; the clear water rolling along with black substances, never mixing, like oil and water.

He reached out towards it, and just as his fingertips brushed it's surface, the lake froze. His heart rate picked up because of surprise, Allen starred at the lake wearily, he reached again and. . .

There was a face there, sleeping so peacefully, even when he is surrounded be a world of nightmare.

Allen doesn't know why, but he cried.

* * *

 **Just nailed! hahahah! I'm crazy, maybe I should stop laughing and talkng to my self.**

Last edited: 2/7/2016


	6. Chapter 6: Curiosity Killed the Cat

O, that way madness lies; let me shun that;

No more of that.

* * *

"Tyki!" The child called, throwing his book onto the table. "I'm bored!"

The aforementioned closed his book, starring at the child before he turned his gaze to the book that the child was reading. "Of course you are," He somewhat replied. "You're reading Hamlet for the umpteen time,"

Tyki opened his book once again, continuing back from the part that he stopped because someone was interru-

"Tyki!" The child whined. The teen sigh, marking the page before he closed it, pushing away the book so that he could read it again when there are no disturbances.

"What?" He ask, his question simple and straightforward.

"Let's go to the city," The seemed to get his attention. He too was bored seeing the arks black and white wall constantly to the point he was getting nausea. Some fresh air would be nice to, and the sky would be great to look at. But. . .There's one thing about city and that's human.

Don't blame him, he's also human but he hates the _other_ humans aside from his family of course, and they annoy him constantly to the brink of sanity. So yes, he hates the humans but not the outside world, even without genetics he would still hate them when you think about the time before he ended up here. So which one would he choose; walls or people; the outside or Hamlet.

"Hmmm,' He contemplate as he weigh those two choices in his mind. His attention briefly turned towards the child across him, whom he momentarily forgotten and was the source of the current problem. Allen was looking at him with anticipation, his one eyes was wide while the other was covered with an eyepatch, for a second, he seemed to be the definition of childlike innocence, with his pale skin almost a ghostly white, long red hair tied neatly to a partial ponytail-

Wait. He was getting off track here.

Fresh air or humans, he returned back to the scale. However, he glanced at the child once again, who was starring at him with such wide, silver eye-

"Gyah!" He screamed as he practically flipped the table if not for his phasing abilities. "FINE! WE GO!" He shouted for no reason whatsoever, in a library no less. The child seemed shocked at first because of the older sudden outburst but as the statement was digested by his mind, he practically skipped from his seat and an to the teen before practically dragging him from the library and dearly beloved books.

The teen sigh before he somehow accepted his situation, instead of him being dragged by the child. He changed the child hands into his and walked faster by him, taking the lead. After all, with the child's sense of direction they would certainly be walking for a month.

"Where should he go?" He ask, glancing briefly at the child.

"Hmmm," Allen pondered, putting his gloved hand on his chin as he thought about it. "France?" He suggested.

The teen smirked, tugging the child hand as he walked faster. They arrived at a seemingly random door, with the number 11 on it, carved elegantly on the oak wood. But Tyki new better and Allen new less, he reached for the doorknob, cursing slightly in his native language as it phased right through it. The second time was a success but he was already a shade of red as the child laugh, laughing at _him_ , more accurately.

"Shut up," He hissed, but as the child shrink away he adopts a more softer tone. "What do you want to do first?" He ask, but already new the answer. After all, they had live with each other long enough to get used to each other quirks.

"Cafe!" The child beamed, a toothy grin appeared on his face.

Tyki hummed in amusement, smirking as he heads towards a familiar cafe where he once recalled, was owned by a man who was currently married to an akuma. The Earl was told him that they had been married for three years, seemingly happy, seemingly perfect, but the woman have a lover whom she met almost every night. The husband however never noticed it since he was so narcotized by her. And one day, the lover died and the wife called back for him and after a week, she seemingly returned back to her husband's embrace.

He snorted at that.

"Bienvenue, maître Tyki," The owner greeted him.

"Bonjour," Tyki replied back. Since the shop is owned by someone wedded to an akuma, The Earl and Road would usually order some pastries here to fill their never ending hunger for sweetness. And so, he was the middleman who fetch it for them. "Je vais manger là aujourd'hui," He replied flawlessly, a waiter greeted them and showed them to their seat.

"We should buy something for the Earl and Road," Allen said, already browsing through different assortment of bread and cakes. Tyki chuckled at the sight, seconds later, a waiter came, holding a notebook in his arm to write down their orders.

"Que voulez-vous manger?" He ask, Allen looked at him confusedly.

"What?" He said quizzically, as if asking someone to repeat back a word they didn't here or understand. Which is currently accurate at this situation.

"I'm sorry," The waiter apologized, a amused smiled adorned his face. "What will you be ordering?" He corrected himself.

"I want a chocolate pie also two strawberry danish," The child replied, closing the menu and handed it to the waiter who furiously scribbled it down furiously.

"A croissant for me and two Earl Grey tea," Tyki continued, he too closed the menu and handed it back to the waiter. "Also, can you pack us two chocolate moist cake?' He added in a hurry.

The waiter nodded and left, leaving the two siblings. Allen started fiddling with his napkin, suddenly he felt angry, wanting to rip is apart along with all the other human in France. The bloodlust continued and he felt wanting to stab his hands with the fork to just quench it, to see blood even if it's is.

"Tyki?" He gazed at the older teen, his voice was trembling and he felt close to tears. He felt like he couldn't control it, the urge to kill, the urge to end something. . .yes. . . the urge to destroy. Everything need to be in destruction, total annihilation. Just like that day, just like _that_ day-

"Allen," Someone spoken his name softly, and if it weren't for his exhence gene he wouldn't be able to hear it. Allen gaze up, looking at the one who called him. Tyki held his hands, rubbing it as he tried to calm down the younger. "Calm down,"

"You felt it too right?" He ask, trembling as he said so. Tyki nodded solemnly as he turned his attention to the window. Allen followed, looking along Tyki's line of sight. He spotted it, an anomaly under the burning sun; "Exorcist," Tyki breathed.

"A general and his apprentice maybe," Tyki suggested. "Apprentices" He corrected, as there were more than one.

It was a yearning, a desire, he wanted so badly to rip out their Innocence, to crush it between his hands as hope extinguish from their eyes. But he held back, he always did. "I can't fight a general," Tyki muttered under his breath, but loud enough for Allen to hear it. "And the Earl ordered to lay low, for now" Allen could feel Tyki's pulse quicken in his hand. Watching like a hawk as they head towards their building to retreat from the scorching sun.

They entered the shop and Tyki lets go of Allen hand, instead he chuckled as if they were having a normal conservation. And on cue, he waiter brought them what they ordered before, along with two boxes of what Allen assumed as chocolate moist cake. "Here," The waiter said, smiling brightly at them while thinking the profits they came with. "Will that be all?"

"Yes," Tyki answered and with that, he was dismissed.

Out of all the table the exorcist has to choose was beside them. Tyki cursed his own look while questioning the way of the universe. Maybe this is a sign that he should engage them in battle or something but even if it's a sign, the Earl's orders are absolute so no. He refrain himself from doing so. Tyki sigh, pulling a piece from his croissant and out it in his mouth.

"Tyki!"The child called, he looked up. Allen was beckoning his food eagerly, a fork and a knife in his hand. "Can you cut' the pie for me?"

That question seem to pull him back to reality whereas before he was having some sort of exentials crisis. Tyki took the utensils from Allen's hand and began cutting the pie into tiny little pieces. He chuckled, an amusing thought suddenly came to him.

"Can you finish it?" He questions, putting away the knife and giving the fork to the child.

"You think I can't?" Allen retorted, a sly grin appeared on his face. Tyki smirked, putting on an innocent face, such a feat indeed!

"To be, or not to be, that is the question," Allen quoted, though it sounded quite amusing with his English dialect. " _Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, o_ _r to take arms against a sea of troubles a_ _nd by opposing end them. To die—to sleep, no more: and by-"_

Tyki groaned, looking at Allen as if he committed a felony. Someone chuckled and their attention turned briefly towards the general who was sitting besides their table. Allen put a piece of pie in his mouth, chewing it thoroughly before his attention turned back to Tyki. " _and by a sleep to say we end The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks That flesh is heir to: 'tis a consummation Devoutly to be wish'd."_

"Did you just quote Hamlet on m-"

"Are you both siblings?" The question cut Tyki's one short. The both of them turned back their attention towards the general, who was smiling nonchalant at them.

"No," Tyki answered, he beckoned a hand towards Allen. "This is my cousin from Britain,"

The man gaze lingered onto Allen, and onto the food that he was eating. "Are you sure you can finish it, child?"

That seemed to jab Allen's pride, he put a hand on his chest. "Of course I can," He stated, putting another piece of pie in his mouth as an affect.

Tyki chuckled. "You should seen him at parties, I don't know where all the food went,"

"And that?" The general ask, beckoning the boxes on the table.

"That's for our family,' Tyki answered boredly, as if the conversation no longer prick his interest.

An eyebrow was raised. "Such big family?"

"Seven and still growing,"

"General," One of his apprentice called, alarmed. "Akumas,"

He stood abruptly, the others followed the notion. They exited the cafe before saying goodbye, not even ordering anything yet. Tyki turned his attention back to his food, only to find it no longer there. He glared accusingly at the child who was eating his pie innocently. Just before he could make any accusation, the building shook and a pillar of flames lit outside. The two exchanged look, and they bailed from the shops along with it's other customers and of course, with the cake boxes in their hands.

"Allen!" Tyki called, swooping down the child and carried him in his arm. A gust of wind blew suddenly, like a whip and the earth rumble along with it, not far from here he could here people shouting and screaming. "To fly or not to fly?"

"Hmmm." Allen contemplate on the idea, the general already saw them and it's not like they would be seeing each other again most likely so. . .

"Fly," He decided.

* * *

 **Sorry, I wanted to do the continuation of the previous chapter where Allen would woke up and all. I though I did it on the computer but couldn't find it so I have to do it again. I didn't have time and I was feeling stressful so I decided to do this. The next will be the continuation from Allen would woke up, but it's all up to you. You can comment me if you want the continuation from where Allen would woke up or just continue this one.**

 **Bye! See you next week.**


	7. Chapter 7: Reaching for light

**Lena-luvs-cats:** Aah I loved this chapter! Taking(?) and Allen were so cute! Speaking of which, in the summary Poker Pair is listed as platonic pairing, so does that mean it isn't available for a romantic relationship.

 **I forgot my username name, lol:** Thank you for your review and too answer your question, yes, Poker Pair is a platonic ship in this story because I can't even write a goddam straight couple, imagine me writing Poker Pair? Yulma on the other hand is fueled by angst so I can write it (probably?) but no worries you shippers, there's plenty of scene for each pairing though not in a romantic way but at least they have some sexuall intercourse.

 **Spoiler alert: The first panel will be from Allen wake up and the rest are his mission. Allen waking up turned to be needed in the plot since it wouldn't go out from my head unless I write it.**

 **Thank you for JJ4S and jy24, along with MesuNeko for always reviewing my story!**

* * *

 **"O coward conscience, how dost thou afflict me!"**

King Richard III (V, iii, 179)

* * *

"I will _protect_ you. . ."

The voice died along with the winds. . .a promise now old and forgotten. . .

"I will never leave your _side_. . .'

But to who did he promise to?

* * *

Allen woke up, shaking and shivering even though he was covered with layers upon layers of blankets, a sound filled the room, someone was crying his breath hitching. Moments later he realize it was him, slowly he sat up, calming down his rogue breathing and glance at the room he was in. _How did I get here?_ He wondered.

Probably not the best thing he did, but Allen pushed away the heavy blanket on top of him and carefully jumped up from his bed. Wincing slightly as he feet hit the cold tiled wall, he walked slowly, making no noise in fear he would wake up others. Something caught his childlike curiosity and took over his attention, he walked cautiously towards a wall. It was not the wall who took his attention but what's on it.

Hundreds and maybe thousands of picture were framed neatly but was stack chaotically on the wall. Some look old, some look new and some looked like it belong to a museum or a vintage store. He doesn't understand the picture, there were hundreds of them but none ever made any sense. It was as if the one who took it just took it without the other's knowing. Though there were one picture which really took his attention, it was plain compared from the others frame but it was the most orderly.

There were the pictures of four men, two of them had auburn while the other pair had mahogany hair like his, and they were all smiling. The one with the only short hair was making a weird pose, making his doppleganger laugh at him. The one who was wearing glasses was saying something, probably commenting on how silly he look. While the one with the long red hair, who let it fall freely unlike the one with the auburn one was looking at them ridiculously but was still smiling, more amused though. It probably was a picture, caught at the right moment.

But Allen felt alarmed, his heart was beating more faster with each second he starred at the picture. A sense of nostalgia filled him along with the sense of dread, Allen felt like crying even though he just stopped it. He felt like bawling his yes out, actually.

The sound of footstep approach him, Allen turned towards the source of it. And if it weren't for sheer will, Allen would pass out or faint already, because the one who was standing in front of him was none other than his beloved dearest, his twisted obsession. Mana was there, the moonlight illuminating his soft features. Looking more like a ghost than a living human.

Most people would be affectionate when they met a family member they thought'd lost but not Allen, he didn't even blink. Allen was stoned, all the emotion he was feeling before suddenly vanished and was replaced by gnawing emptiness. It all shattered like an illusion, when he was embrace in a hug by the man himself and he crumbled. Allen gripped the man's shirt tightly as if fearing he would disappear if it was loose. He buried his face into Mana's neck, muffling the sound of his grossly sobbing.

 _"I want us to be together," They had promised, once upon a time. An oath between brothers._

"I missed you," Mana whispered, combing the child's hair with his hand.

"Welcome home, The Fourteenth,"

It was so funny, how that simple phrase could conjure up so much emotion and a lifetime of memories.

* * *

Slowly he yawned, rubbing his tired eye with his right hand. He reclined back, starring blankly at the city below, the cool night air heightening his senses.

"Tyki," The child called, yawning again as sleep threaten to overtake him. "Did you find them yet?"

"You think?" Tyki retorted, shifting the extra baggage on his back. "Thanks to your usefulness though,"

"Your welcome," The child sang, making the teen anger flare up before it diminished.

Allen rested his head on Tyki's neck, closing his eyes as he let his conscious taken away from him. The air was fresh and cool, just after a downpour, the moon was directly on top of them as they went higher in the sky. "Tyki," He moaned, "I'm hungry,"

"We have a party after this," Tyki answered, threatening to drop the child from thousands of feet in the air but held back. "Do you sense something?" He ask.

"A little to the East, they're moving," Allen said the answer tiredly. But listlessness melted from him as the grip on his lifeline loosened, making gravity come back with vengeance. "TYKI!" He screamed out the name as his hand reached for the aforementioned. His heart nearly stopped as Tyki reached for him, but as his hand tried to grip, it simply phased through. Much to both shock and horror, Allen continue to fall down, towards the City of Light, as most dubbed.

Allen went below the cloud, dropping at an alarming speed. The sight was surely breathtaking though, at night, Paris lives up to it's name as the City of Light. It was as if seeing the sky, Allen reached down, grasping for the star. And reality shook him, Allen was still falling, still headed towards the ground, even with healing abilities it would take a long time to heal a cracked skull. And most of all, it would hurt. Allen hate being hurt, who does? Those certain minorities perhaps.

"Allen!" Someone called him, but he wasn't sure, the wind was whistling higher and higher and everything sounded like his name to him. He tried to calm down himself, and probably, accepted his fate as he closed his eyes. Thankfully, an arm wrapped around his abdomen and Allen release a relief sigh, looking up at his saviour. "I think this mark the end of our mission,"

Tyki nodded in agreement.

* * *

They arrived right on time and by right on time they meant an hour late. It was not their fault though, finding the building was a pain in the neck and humans were goddam awful at giving people direction. After being nagged by their boss, Tyki bid his farewell to socialize with the other guest, more like flirting though.

"Earl," Allen whined, grabbing the man by his hand. "I'm hungry,"

The Earl chuckled, bending down and pinched the child's cheek. "Aren't you always," He cooed before they both went to the dinning table. The Earl hold a plate so that the child could choose which food he want to eat, which is little compared to what he usually does. "Come on, Allen," He called, extending his hand so the child could took it. They both went to the table, where all the other noble was eating. It took quite a while, to search a table with the least people as most of them were filled with ladies and lords.

"Here," He handed Allen his plate after cutting the food into tiny little pieces. Allen grabbed a fork, as he put the food in his mouth someone cawed. Allen failed to escape as he realize the presence late, immediately he was embrace in a tight hug by a certain male he dubbed pedophile. He cried, making Sheryl release him hurriedly. Behind him, his wife tisked, giving Sheryl a stern look before wiping away Allen tears. They both went away, joining in with Road and their newest member, Wisely.

Allen continued back to his eating, leaving an eye on lookout for any other disturbances. "Chew thoroughly, Allen," The Earl scolded, wiping away the crumbs on his cheek with his napkin.

"Sorry," He apologise, though it was unconfirmed since you can't hear anything when his mouth is filled with food. The Earl chuckled before his gaze turned to look at the crowd, if you looked closely, you could see a few normal oddities. A noble foreigner being crowded by noble daughters, both eligible and ineligible, a young girl, wearing an amethyst gown trying to dance with a boy who was wearing the same colour as her. Not far from them, people crowded in a circle observing a couple who was dancing along with other pair in the baroque dance.

Allen looked back at the Earl, who's gaze never left his family. He observe the man, drinking the sight of his father.

* * *

It was boring, some people was still dancing, though their movement were getting sluggish. Noblemen were talking, gossiping and spreading rumors like they usually do. Though some were discussing political issues and actually talking about their job and trying to spread their power to minor noble. It was the normal to say the least, Allen had his own share on parties, but it's usually about birthdays and tea parties.

Much to Allen displeasure, the piano tune went to a decrescendo, it's melody ending with a pause. The pianist stood up and bowed to the crowd, where they clapped and cheered, to get a short brake. Other instrument continued playing, the violin, taking hold of the song as the piano was not there to fill the melody.

The Earl was talking with a nobleman, engaging in some sort political discussion where Allen could care less. They laugh from time to time, making a few joke occasionally though none of them noticed the child's boredom. At least, until he sigh. . .very loudly.

The Earl chuckled, ruffling the child's hair. "Are you bored, Allen?" He ask, amusement coating his voice.

"Is it your child?" The nobleman ask, eyeing at the child with curiosity.

The Earl shook his head slowly, as if the idea of Allen not being his child saddens him. "He's from Sheryl's part of the family,"

"Oh," The noble chuckled. "I see,"

Now that the conversation is leading to nowhere, Allen decided to finally make his point. "Road is annoying Wisely, Tyki is avoiding Road and Sheryl is with Tricia," He stated, and he took a deep breath. "There's no more piano!" He said exasperate before putting his head in his arm.

"Are you interest in the piano, child?" The nobleman questioned, now that their current topic is about the child.

Instead the Earl answered. "Of course he is, he's our precious musician, after all,"

At that Allen growled, he was not little, he was seven already and already went through hell.

"Why not play me a song?" Allen perked up at the word _play_ , he glance warily at the stage and the giant crowd in front of it.

"Sure," He agreed, chuckling nervously. "But can you send me there?"

* * *

 _The crowd._ Allen though, was bigger than he thought. Now that they had a new performer on the stage, they huddled tightly, curious about the young child who seemed lost on it. Allen gulped, starring at the noblemen and The Earl, instantly regretting his answer to play the piano.

Gulping down, he walked towards the piano at the centre of the stage, alone. The noble just have to call down the other performer so he could have the stage by himself. The chair squeaked slightly against the wooden floor as Allen adjusted it to accommodate it with his height. Some from the crowd snickered at him while some just stood there, their eyes boring into his soul.

Suddenly, the world went silent as his hand hovered above the piano, inches away from the keys. Just like an illusion, the silence shattered, replacing it with a soft tune. After pondering for a while, his hands flew an octave higher, turning the once lullaby into some sort of baroque. Allen played dramatically, accenting the note he deemed as right, _crescendo_ and _decrescendo_ the bars in random order, playing some part with _vivace_ and some part with _largo._

By this point, the song had become unrecognizable to him, he was playing it with sheer randomness, only the notes remained the same. And judging the awestruck faces of those who was laughing at him earlier, he was playing it pretty well or horribly wrong. Hopefully the latter was wrong. As the song end, he held the last not with _pause_ , drilling it slightly.

Quickly and eagerly, he stood from the stage. Bowing at the shocked crowd before leaving in a hurry. Though late, as the musician already left the stage, the crowd clapped and cheered, begging for a second one but Allen was already done with it. He starred back at the crowd from the balcony, starring at Tyki as he conveyed a message through his eyes, hopping the latter would understand. Then, with speed and agility, he jumped from the third floor, Tyki, on the underhand, was wondering why Allen was looking at him weirdly before he leaped down from the building.

Immediately, he went to that balcony, hopping to catch a sigh of the youngest member but he was already gone. Tyki sigh, wondering what excuses he should tell this time, the truth maybe?

* * *

 **I forgot what's Cheryl wife name so I just made it up from my memory. Though, I spelt his name differently but the computer keep correcting his name so in the end I used it's version. How was it? Though I realize the plot is not progressing. I want Allen to spend some time with the family before angst happen.**

 **Bye! you can PM me if you have some ideas. I won't mind.**

 **Last edited: 20/9/2016**


	8. Chapter 8: Sweet Catastrophe

**Hi! I'm back! Thank you to the people who manage to read this far. My exam was good enough, if I say so myself. I'm going to publish an another story, though I don't know it's title yet but it's going to be about Neallen, I'm a big neallen fan. I tell you the details once I create it's title. This chapter is short since it was a bit hard to write this and I don't have enough talent to make it more detailed, so yeah. It's good to be back.**

* * *

 **"Let me** _ **in."**_

 **"Where only your** _ **thoughts**_ **have been,"**

 **"Let me occupy your** _ **mind."**_

 **"As** _ **you**_ **do mine."**

* * *

 _"I sung myself a quite lullaby. . ."_

 _"Watching as fate drive them to their end. . ."_

 _"Tragedy bares it's fang at me and I waited. . ."_

 _"Waited and waited, for mine also to end."_

"Is that a new song?" Hesitation, comfort and reassurance. the other presence was nothing but love. There was shallow breathing, and the dimming heartbeat. Under the dark night, his presence was his only light.

Dying light.

"Come on. . . it will be fine. . ." he sobbed, hugging his friend tighter in his arm. So fragile and so light, it was like glass.

". . .I will never leave your side. . .so. . .please. . ."

Frustration, guilt, and so much more. Overflowing, and finally, _something_ had broke.

"Don't leave mine. . ."

* * *

Something crept his heart, am irksome feeling. It was like as if he was trapped in a room, with water falling from the roof. He breathe faster, more deeper to satisfy his lung satisfaction (as if he was actually drowning). It felt uncomfortable against his chest, his heart beating noticeably loud, as if it was stuck in a cage and wanted to be let out. What was this feeling? Something that he hadn't felt in a long time. What was it again. . .hmmm. . .yes. . .Boredom.

He was bored. Yes! bored, Boredom!

How do people even cope with boredom? It was impossible to deal with.

Sighing he planted himself to his pillow, cursing his somehow luck and blaming karma while he was at it. Karma, definitely karma, it was all it's fault.

Somehow, escaping a party or a ball is bad etiquette, suddenly disappearing from a ball hosted by the minister of France is just punishment worthy.

It turns out, Allen's little Houdini act cause quite a terror, including Tyki's acting, especially when one couldn't identify the Portugal words that he had said. The minister of France, the one that The Earl was conversing at that time with, send out his troop of policeman to search for the lost child. Only to found him being dragged by The Earl back to the party by his ears.

So yeah, he was bored, staying in his room for almost a whole week while Tyki was off killing people that THEY were assigned to. Karma, never underestimate karma.

There was a knock at his door along with it's silent clicking, it seems that people didn't need his permission to enter his room, but then again, what was the point of knocking in the first place. His bed shifted, notifying that someone was putting weight on it.

"Allen," Someone called, stroking his hair with gentle hands. "Can you accompany me, I'm seeing an old friend of mine," the other's voice was soft, filled with love and affection that he had always yearned.

Silence, dreaded silence.

"Road's out along with Tyki, Sheryl is having a politic crisis while the other's need peace and quite, so would you," it continues.

Allen turned around slightly, seeing through the edge of his eyes as he contemplates the answer. It depends though, who was he seeing. "Who?" He ask.

The older man chuckled, ruffling his hair before finally releasing it. "It's someone you know too,'

* * *

"Don't you need your costume?" Allen ask, the older man chuckled, seemingly amused by his question. Familiar hand tightened the grip on the child's hold, the owner staring at the child with warm caramel eyes, so sweet.

But what he got was no answer, but rather silence. And he sigh in frustration. Instead of the path ahead, he gazed at the sky, grey clouds hanging lowly in the sky with snowflakes drifting down in a dance with the wind, slowly tainting the earth with it's white purity. It was winter again and they were walking through an abandoned city, which was once an akuma nest.

Allen wondered why, though. The Earl said he wanted to meet someone, but who could possibly be here-

"Just my luck," Someone grumbled, and just faintly, the sweet scent of tobacco could be wift.

That feeling it was back, uncomfortable, unbearable, it made his chest a bit to tight. Irksome. Dread. And somehow, he realized, this feeling was not boredom but then again, what was it again. . .He doesn't know.

"Are you stalking me?" the man ask again, crimson hair tied in a low ponytail and that all-too familiar ebony crescent mask that covers his face. Cross Mariam.

His breathe quickens, realization kicking in. Allen gripped the Earl's hand more tightly while putting his other hand on his chest. What was it again, that feeling? He- he doesn't know. Thoughts, voices starts to scream in his mind; of a family he had lost and the regret that came with it. He drowned out the noises and finally, he gave up. All he wanted was to just make it stop, Stop, STOP!

It hurts to breathe, his mind hurt, it hurts so much. Tears accumulate in his eyes, just please, make it stop.

That feeling, I don't want it anymore.

"Who's that kid?" Cross, uncertainty lacing his voice. It hurts actually, to be unrecognized from someone that had meant so much to him once

Adam gripped the child's hand tighter, as if afraid to let go. "You really don't know him, do you?" he spoken it softly, as if he had already know the answer.

Allen gazed up, his mouth gaped as he stares in shock. "Cross. . .?" He find himself questioning. The familiar name nothing more then a familiar memory.

Ah, yes, he remembers now, everything is so much clearer now. Of how everything starts to break.

Though there were still question left unanswered.

 _'Why did you left?'_

Cross growled, pulling out his gun. "Return him,"He hissed, finger threateningly puling the trigger.

"Why would I?" The Earl mocked, it was unnatural for that man to be like that.

"Traitor," Cross retorted.

"Who betrayed who?"

"You did."

Allen stepped forward, his hand never left the Earl's.

"Dante inferno."

 ** _"It's okay. . .it's okay. . ."_**

 ** _"Cause in the end,"_**

 ** _"Everything was for your sake."_**

Things were quite now and everything was finally at peace. The demon in his heart, finally breaking free in the form of a hurricane of fire. There wasn't much time left, not when the fire was eating away the oxygen in the area. He had to relay this final message.

 _"I missed you,"_

An unrecognizable features crossed his feature, something akinly to shock and realization. Though he couldn't see much as the doors started to close

* * *

.

.

.

The door creaked open slightly before the man who was opening it, gave up, and instead walked through it. He stalked towards the single bed and sigh, running his hands through his hair.

"What happened?" He decided ask, sitting besides the child who was suppose to be sleeping. It was the dead of night, after all.

"I met someone," The child answered softly, curling himself into a ball and hugged the pillow tighter.

"You did, huh?"

"it's so unbearable. . .this feeling. . .it won't stop,"

It was irksome, dread, as a feeling of bad omen.

* * *

 **"Our story goes on, and on, and on,"**

 **"But in the end. . ."**

 **"I was the only one who kept on waiting,"**

* * *

 _"You're the only one I have left. . ."_

I can't loose anymore people in my life, so please. . .Neah.

Use me


	9. Chapter 85: Upon our joined hands

_"And so the child went into deep sleep," he sung out softly, hugging the carcasses of his friend,_

 _"Among the grey ashes in the burning flames. . ."_

* * *

"Hurry! Catch them!"

"There! Corner Them!"

A blur of black line speed past him and he couldn't stop himself from smiling. "Faster, Neah!"he cried out, trying to catch up with the the's speed.

"Are you done yet, Cross?" Mana, the older of the twins ask, glancing behind to see the red head teen as he fumbles upon a piece of paper. Meanwhile, Cross was too busy trying to decode what his brother and other friend had wrote, leaning against a brick wall with Mana in front of him.

Allen slowed down, muttering something under his breathe as his finger seemed to make symbols in the air. And just as he was about the do the last one, Neah suddenly jumped in front of him, causing him to falter.

 _"Bind!"_

He stares at Neah with shock, hurt evident in his eys of the sudden betrayel.

"Neah," He said exasperated, now is not the time.

"You're going to hurt Mana," Neah said. Expanding his arms in front of his older brother like a protective shield.

Allen growled, now is not the time to be an overprotective brother.

"I have to," He answered, trying to make sense of his friend thick skull. "He put a barrier and unless I hurt him-"

"But still. . ."

"I'm finished!" Cross exclaimed suddenly, holding up the piece of paper high in the air.

Allen glared at his younger brother than at Nea. "Traitor," He accused.

"You were the one who cheated first," Mana said from behind Nea.

"It was Allen's idea," Neah said innocently, pointing a finger at his ginger friend who was seething in anger. Thank goodness Neah had cast a binding spell on him, or not he would be an interesting shade of purple and blue already.

''Just wait till I got my hands on you, you little ssshole, I'll shove your d!ck down your throat, then, I'm going to shove sh t up your ass-"

Neah yelped, hiding behind his dear Mana for protection. Allen is a demon when he's angry.

* * *

 _"First one. . .then two. . .rises upon your beloved face," He chocked back a sob, gazing at the clear night sky._

 _"A thousand dreams. . .trickled back to earth,"_

* * *

"It's okay, Allen," Neah assured, making his way towards his friend by the windowsill.

"Those stupid Black Order," Allen cursed, scowling as he turned his head to see Neah. "If only-"

"Of course they want you,' Neah sigh, shaking his head disappointingly as he walk towards Allen to cross the distance between them. How many times had they had this talk already? "After all, you're such a good sorcerer,"

Allen humphed as he cross his arms over his chest, turning his gaze to the window.

"Allen. . ." He continued, using a tone that one would use at a child. "Cross already left in your place,"

Allen averted his gaze, glaring at the floor instead. Anywhere but Neah, so he can't see his pitiful state.

"It was for your sake," Neah try reasoning. "They won't stop targeting you," _Or us in that matter._

"You didn't have to punch and cursed him, though," He added quickly, after all, this was a delicate matter he was tiptoeing on.

Ale finally gaze up, looking at Neah, mercury eyes brimming with unshed tears to look at the golden ones, of drying ember. A starry hand went to wipe away a tear that dared stray.

Neah understood of course, if his dear Mana also left him. It would be a disaster.

"There's still Mana and me, right?" He smiled when Allen nodded. "Sing me a song, won't you?"

Not long after, an over familiar melody filled the room, along with a melodious voice. Neah find himself lost in the song and he too, in the end joined.

It was their song after all, their duet. Just the two of them in their own little world.

 _You. . .and Mana. . .the both of you mean the world to me._

* * *

"Neah!" Someone exclaimed. "What happened?"

"Mana. . .Mana. . ." Neah sobbed, tugging his shirt as if his life depended on it. "He left. . ."

Allen hugged Neah thightly, patting his back in a rhythmic order. Neah sobs grew quiter, he gripped Allen's back a little too thightly in his opinion, that he knew there would be a mark after this.

Along with that, Allen hummed a quite lullaby, hoping that it would calm his friend down.

"It's okay, Neah," He sung out the word. _Even if the whole world is against you._ "I would never leave your side,"

* * *

 _"Across millions of years. . .the prayers have finally returned back to Earth," He knows that he didn't have much time left until his existence was erased. But, he wanted to claim this final moment as his._

 _"I will still continue to pray,"_

* * *

"No. . . _please. . ."_

"It's okay Nea. . .it will be fine. . ." Allen assured, a sweet smile on his lips.

"After all. . .I don't have that much life left so. . .I'm going out with a bang!" He hesitated, breaking a little as he saw that sad, petrified look on his friend. Afraid of losing another family.

 _But in the end, everything will be okay._

 _Because everything was for your sake._

To finally end this endless war.

"Hey, Nea," He called again. This was a moment of revelation, changing the tide of the war.

So _they_ could be together again.

"Can you turn me into a _martyr_ ,"

* * *

It was supposed to be their song, their duet. . .

"Please bestow upon this child your love. . ." He sung out those words, hugging tighter the body in his arms.

Yet. . .

"Upon _our_ joined hand, leave a gentle kiss. . ."

Why did he sing it alone.

* * *

 _"It hurts so much!" Allen sobbed, gripping and clawing his chest. "These feelings. . .why won't it stop?"_

* * *

 **I came to wonder my old self, what were you actually thinking? This is impossible, I'm crying, don't do this to me!**

 **Last edited: 20/9/2016**


	10. Chapter 9: Mutualisme

**hanks to JJ45 who recommended me to be your beta, it's fine though since I don't know ho to do the beta. I published the Neallen fic though it isn't in the romantic genre, more like friendship is magic, 'Don't stop, it's our duet'. And thank you Candy_Crackpot, for helping me with it's idea. Some of you might still not understand what's going on with this story, but I assure you as the story progresses you will understand it more thoroughly.**

* * *

 **So much time on the other side,**

 **Waiting for you to wake up.**

 **Maybe I'll see you in another life,**

 **If this wasn't enough**

* * *

"Aren't we suppose to do it together. . ." He accused, his voice fading with the winds.

 _Just the both of us,_

"Then. . .why?" His world crumble as he said so, trying his best not to break.

 _You and me. . ._

Finally he collapse. "Why did you left me all alone?" He cried.

 _Against the whole world._

* * *

"Hey, Neah," He called softly, caressing the other cheek with his right hand. Their skin would have met, if the ice between them wasn't there. There was a barrier between them, a frozen lake, keeping apart the different worlds.

"I sometimes wish," He continued, a sad smile grazing his lips. "That everything never happened,"

"But of course," His voiced out tauntingly, mocking himself for even fantasizing about it. "There's no turning back,"

The world shook and Allen hissed, holding his forehead with his left arm to stop the incoming migraine. Allen smiled again, looking back at the frozen lake weekly, his right hand wiping the cracked surface to mend it.

Black matter swum eagerly under the ice's surface, eager to be unleashed upon the world again. Allen sigh, collapsing onto the ice on his back, he covered his eyes with his left arm while the right was still connected to the frozen lake. Peeking through the little hole of his arm, he saw his world of dreams. The black sky hung loose, like a curtain, while the moon and the stars suspended in it, as if caught in a spiderweb.

Allen smiled melancholically, tears starting to accumulate in his eyes as he tapped a familiar tune on the ice. "I'm so lonely without you," He confessed.

Allen closed his eyes, waiting for darkness overtake him.

The next thing he knew, he woke up.

"Ouch!" He hissed, gripping his chest tightly. Underneath his thin clothes he could faintly see the outline of bandages, wrapped around his body delicately.

"Lie down," Someone ordered, pushing him back onto his bed without warning. Allen glared at the culprit, crossing his arms around his chest as he did so. Tyki chuckled, ruffling the younger hair as he handed out a bowl of porridge. "You were banged up pretty badly," Tyki commented, handing Allen another bowl of porridge and putting away the finished one.

"Hmm-mmh." Allen simply hummed.

"You took up a general," Tyki continued, something laced his voice, something that Allen couldn't understand. Allen hope it was awe. "Got beaten up a little and still live,"

"So that's why, I'm covered in bandages," Allen stated, handing Tyki the bowl of porridge he was eating and demanded another one.

"Innocence," Tyki answered casually, Allen nodded in agreement. He put down the metal spoon, giving the finished bowl to Tyki and requested for water. What could you say, he was a patient here.

"The Earl called you," Tyki continued. Allen choked on his water, nearly sitting it from his mouth but instead he swallowed it and indulge into a coughing feat. He starred at Tyki ridiculously, as if the older teen grew a second head.

"Now?" He ask exasperated, after all, he was injured. But unfortunately, his dream was crushed when Tyki nodded, standing up and extending a hand to Allen. "I'm your chaperone," Allen accepted the hand with no qualms, the two of them headed towards the door.

Allen limped from time to time, his left up gripping his chest, but not too tightly in fear ripping the stitches, maybe he went a bit overboard with his reunion with Cross.

"You need a walking stick, a _walker_ ," Tyki chuckled. Allen payed him so heed, eyes simply starring ahead. "What I need is milk, Milk! To strengthen my bone," He exclaimed, much like how a child would.

"That much of milk won't let you grow taller Shounen- Hey! OW!"

Allen screamed a battle cry, lunging at the older man with anger. Tyki's back hit the whole and he found himself screaming in terror. Just as Allen was about to do something to Tyki, the door swung open, revealing a very stressful Earl. Allen glared at Tyki, then showed his tongue at him to which Tyki did back. He walked towards the Earl, wobbling as he did so but the older man didn't help him.

He sat across the Earl, watching as the man pour him a cup of it and added sugar in it. He sigh before slumping against the soft, plush sofa-

"Allen," Adam called pulling him from his daydreaming. Allen eye shot open, focusing solely onto the man. Allen studied his feature, trying to find something he recognize, trying to find any sign of Mana in to no avail, it was still the Earl's. "Did you have a weird dream last night?"

"Like what?" Allen ask, keeping his poker face so Adam can't find anything in him.

The Earl shrugged, seemingly in a laid back attitude. "You know, like the Fourteenth or. . .Nea. . ."

He put a blank face on his feature, acting like a child was easy, much like playing poker with Tyki. The Fourteenth was an anomaly, he had learned in his previous life, still is and still was. Successor were supposed to maintain the memory, not the soul.

"Say, Adam," The child called, The Earl perked up, after all, it's rarely for the child to call him by his name. Allen fumbled with the loose string of his shirt. "Can I. . .Uh. . .go outside?" He ask, making sure the bandagearound his chest looks less noticeable.

The Earl sigh, a faint smile on his lips. "You can't," He answer, hesitating a little when he saw the look on the child's face. "You have to recover,"

Allen pouted, crossing his arms over his chest and hissed when the movement tugged his stitches. The Earl wince, as if he also felt that pain on his chest. "Don't you have a party next week? Sheryl planned it all for you,"

That seem to brighten up the mood as Allen shot up, giving the man a look as if not believing his words. "Sheryl didn't said anything though," He said, eyebrow scrunching as if recalling the conversation he said with the man.

"It was suppose to be a surprise, but don't tell him that I told you that,"

The child thought for a second, before slumping back to the chair. "Fine," Allen grumbled. "Is that all?"

"Huh?" The man blinked.

"Is that all that you want to say to me?" Allen repeated, speaking the words thoroughly and slowly.

The Earl felt devastated, after all, he wanted to spend more time with his dearest fourteenth. But. . .Allen need rest. "Yes, that'll be all,"

Allen stood up, saying goodbye to the older man and give him a hug, before walking towards the exit. Adam starred at the retreating back of the child, smiling fondly as he did so. His _Musician_ just returned back to him and he couldn't be more happier.

 _This time the fourteenth wouldn't betray me again right, dear Mana?_

* * *

 **I'm sorry for this chapter, there's a lot of grammatical mistakes and I realized the previous chapter also had lots of mistake that I didn't realize. And this chapter seemed a bit since I'm so tired right now. Now most of you might not still understand, let me explain to you, in my theory, I imagine the the Earl and Mana are separate being, so I'll refer the other part as Adam while the other is Mana. In this chapter, the Earl was Adam, they're not like Allen and Nea who are separated by something but I try to imagine them as separate but they can you know be linked through each other, like when the other persona take over they remember what happen and all that. Well writing the Earl was hard So sorry.**

 **Last edited: 20/9/2016**


	11. Chapter 10: The start of our symphony

**So much time,**

 **On the other side. . .I waited;**

 **For you to wake up.**

* * *

Most people would get gifts on their birthday, such as: books, jewelries or a pleasant surprise that they are not actually blood-related to their parent. Allen on the other hand, got himself an ark. His old one to be exact, well not _his_ but thanks to his current situation and who he was now, he might as well claim it as his.

He excuses himself from the current party, which brought up cries from Sheryl who had worked so hard to plan it only for the birthday, only for the boy to exit after ten minutes. And for once, he was able to exit with the help of Road and Tyki since they knew he wanted some alone time with his ark.

That leads to the current predicament, as he wanders aimlessly around the stark white city. A pang of paranoia hit him, making him look back and forth in fear someone was tailing him which in fact was impossible, since he would felt the other presence by now. Maybe it was because how big this place is and how empty it was.

Rows of unattended house loomed over him, parks and roads. This is the very definition of a ghost town, but, well now there's an occupant, isn't there?

He felt small, so small, walking down the empty roads, passing by non-occupant houses, passing through deserted park. This place is so big and he was so small.

 _It wasn't always like that_ , he thought. This feeling. . .is wrong. . .The Ark was his home, it should feel welcoming, warm. . .not empty and cold.

It was wrong, so wrong. . .someone. . .someone changed it, _someone_ changed this place.

Allen already realized that as soon as he stepped inside the Ark, but who could? The only way to change it is by playing the will at _the_ room. Unless. . .

Allen sigh as he closed his eyes, he tuned his ears onto the ark. It sounded so empty. . .so cold. . .As if it was sleeping. . .Yes, the Ark is asleep, waiting for it's owner to wake it up.

He stopped in his track, eyes opening to see a familiar door, with that familiar elegant carvings. And with no hesitation he turned the doorknob and entered.

 _The room_. He thought as he stepped in. _Changed._

A sad smiled made it's way onto his face, Allen walked into the room slowly. His steps echoed in the room, lonely reflection of himself was casted on the wall as it was mirror. It was dark and cold, and plain unattended. He made his way towards the grand piano at the center of the room and as he neared it, he hesitated. Hands twitching as it tried to touch the piano, hovering expectantly on the keys, just twitching to play, and finally it did. A wave of sadness washed over him and he felt himself drowning, gasping for air, his hands trying to break the surface.

Each notes send a jolt from his spine, raw power channeling through the piano and to the rest of the Ark. A wake up call. He was crying, he realize when the world was nothing but a murky lake, and yet he continued to play. He was best at that.

* * *

 _"Hey,_ _Neah_ _," Allen called, gripping the side of his arm as he smiled hesitantly._

 _Neah glance at him, turning his gaze away from the window. The scenery outside was a burning gold, his own precious location in the Ark._

 _He wondered though, why was Allen acting like this._

 _"We're your family right?"_

* * *

And finally he played. Hands reaching out to play the keys, feeling the familiar smoothness under his and ebony. It felt so foreign to him, as it had been a long time since he had played this piano and yet, he felt familiar, the Ark changed but at the same time he didn't, though it felt as if something is missing. . . _someone_ is missing. . .

 _This was their song, just the two of them. A duet._

"Wake up," He said softly. a jolt of electricity beamed from the piano. Sending impulses onto the whole place, ordering for it to wake up.

And as the song came almost to it's end, he played it _rit._ slowing it down. _Please. . .make it back to the way it was._ Just a wistful thinking, but he couldn't help it. He was a man of the past after all.

Suddenly he played it _forte_ , hitting the last keys with pure force and held it with a _pause_. "Wake up!" He ordered through gritted teeth, and outside, he felt the Ark shook.

* * *

 _"Of course, Allen" Nea answered happily. He reached out to swipe away the locks of red hair, so he could see the beloved face._

 _"_ _I wouldn't have it any other way,"_

* * *

"Hey, Road," Tyki called, taking a sip from his drink. "Did you felt it?"

Road nodded, a faint smile on her lips. But at the same time she looks so sad.

"It's time Allen, for you to choose which side you're on,"

* * *

The burning sunset. . .

And the sound of the winds. . .

.

 _"And so the boy went to sleep,"_

"Hey Allen!" Someone called, but he ignored it as he was to indulge by his own singing

.

The plain of gold. . .

That stretches until the horizon. . .

.

 _"Upon that beloved face. . .shinning. . .one. . .two,"_

"Allen!" He called once again, more urgent this time.

The boy looked down, a man looked up at him, his arm stretched upwards for the child. A familiar man at a familiar place, his hair flowed along with the air current, dry air of the upcoming autumm.

"Let's go home,"

.

Mana waited Neah for far too long, he had given up. But only partly.

.

Allen jumped down, landing on the ground professionally before taking the older man's hand.

He looked back at his golden home, watching as it began to fade away. "I'll come back," He whispered, a gentle gust of winds blew away his promise.

* * *

 **Okay, okay, okay. I think I remember what was suppose to happen. But I'm still not sure.**

 **Last edited: 20/9/2016**


	12. Chapter 11: In All but Blood

**For you my dear,**

 **I give a thousand of memories.**

 **Before I bid my goodbye.**

* * *

 _"Mana's going to kill you," Allen said as he take a sip from his coffee, still gazing at the wreckage that made him woken up in the first place._

 _"No he's not," Nea replied who had just give up trying to fix it. "Beat me into a pulp, yes," He continued quickly._

 _._

 _._

 _._

"What are you doing?" Allen question, eyeing at Tyki Mikk with curiosity as the latter was shuffling cards, quite expertly if he say so himself.

"Shuffling," tyki replied boredly.

"Just shuffling?" Allen ask again, gaining an exasperated sigh from his companion. And with that, Allen silenced himself, not wanting to annoyed the young teen more. He slumped against his seat and instead, gaze outside the window. But he couldn't see much from it since rain limited his vision. It was always raining or snowing when he comes out, Allen would actually want to see the sun from time to time.

But still he was restless, sitting in a train almost full of other humans with no entertainment whatsoever. After the first thirty minutes he thought of jumping out the window and just end it but then it started raining and there's no way he's getting wet.

"Why didn't we use the Ark?" He ask while staring at his reflection in the window, tracing faint outlines behind him.

"To risky," Tyki answered, as if that made sense to the child.

"Mine?" He question again.

"I thought you forbid _us_ from using it," Tyki said, twisting the words into a sarcastic comment.

"But _I'm_ the one who going to use it," Allen replied, stating the obvious. "You're just baggage," He waved his hand in dismissal as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"You flatter me," Tyki replied harshly, finally stopping from his shuffling and instead put his full attention on the boy across him.

"At least you're not _extra_ baggage," Allen snorted, turning his head to face Tyki while resting it on his arm. "Or trash or-"

"I got it!I got it!" Tyki exclaimed, not wanting to hear anymore badmouthing, especially about him. He scowled in annoyance but instead it put a smile on the child's face, years of playing with Road have rubbed of him.

"Tyki!" He whined, sounding like a child. "Why are we here anyway?"

Tyki sighed, wondering if he should pinch the child's cheek for acting to cute or just slap him silly for annoying him. He wondered if he should partner up with Sheryl next time. . .wait, No!. . .Allen is better, Allen is the best person to be partnered with, at least he does not molested, traumatise or _play_ with people. Allen is just like an innocent lamb if he was compared with the rest of his family. He do whine from time to time or be lazy as hell but at least he does the job right. . .sometimes.

"Two exorcist," Tyki replied, finally realizing he been starring at Allen a bit long to be called creepy. "Their new but their synchronization rate is high, almost General high," He use his hand to show how _high_ it is.

Allen nodded in understandment adding another reason in the list of why is Allen the best partner to work with. He never ask question when it comes to _missions._ If only it could apply to the reest of his curiosity.

"Age?" Allen asked, sounding a bit excited. Which of course he was since he had only fought finders and amature exorcist before.

"14 and 15,"

Allen perked up. "That's your age Tyki!" He exclaimed happily, as Tyki was at the age of fifteen.

"And that's half your age, _Shounen,"_ Tyki continued, earning a frown from the seven year old child.

Well seven by appearance, by age. . .

"Whatever. . ." Allen grumbled, burrowing his head in his arms and insisted he's in a bad mood. Still a child indeed.

* * *

"I hate you!" Allen hissed, crossing his arms over his chest and turned away from the laughing teen.

"Sorry, Allen. . .you were so small. . .I didn't notice you. . ." Tyki said between breathes, earning a glare from the child.

"A pedophile Tyki!" Allen exclaimed, earning a few curious glance from the crowd. "A pedophile almost kidnap me!" He said ridiculously.

"You handle pedophiles in occasion,"

"Okay," Allen agreed. "But what if he raped me. What would you do?"

Tyki shrugged. "Good job. . .on getting laid. . .?" He said hopefully.

Allen snorted at that, his mood already improving but for better or for worse?

"Oka-"

"Sorry kid," Someone apologise, Allen glared harshly at the random stranger who just knocked him. He crossed his arms and turned away, pouting. The stranger retract back his extended arm and out it over his chest, a pained look express on his face. "Ouch!" He exclaimed.

"You're worse than the pedophile who tried to rape me," Allen stated, still not seeing the stranger in the eye.

"What-"

"At least he didn't knock me down-"

"Wait-"

"And instead, tried to sweep me off my feet." Allen finished and by that he continued glaring at the stranger who is now flustered. Not long after, he heard _someone_ break into fits of laughter, or rather two _people._ One he dubbed as Tyki while the other a stranger, let's call him Stranger 2.1.

Stranger 1.1 glared at Stranger 2.1 who was trying hard no to laugh again, and then, glared at Tyki who was not-so trying to contain his amusement. "Are you _that_ pedophile!" He spat out, voice lace with venom.

Tyki put both of his hands up as a signal of defeat and use one of it to beckon Allen. "We're sibling," He assured.

"But he's still a pedophile in certains way," Allen continued, earning a glare from his fellow _brother._ "Everyone in the family is a pedophile,"

Two pair of eyebrow was raised as if they did not believe that the two of them we're blood related. But it was true since they were _brothers_ in all but blood.

"If we're pedophile then does that made you a lolicon," Tyki retorted.

Allen hummed, as if he was thinking about it for a moment. "Road's a lolicon, you're all pedophiles and I'm autosexual," Allen corrected it with a grin.

That (some sort) statement alone brought the whole situation to maximum awkwardness. Tyki tried to cover his face in shame, he didn't remember teaching Allen any of this stuff. Heck! He was sure to give Allen children rated book, well, in his opinion _Hamlet_ is a children book since they did far more twisted stuff but still.

 _Sheryl's going to kill me._ Tyki thought. He could imagine Sheryl reaction when he knows Allen now a little _bad_ stuff.

"Where did you learn it?" Tyki ask, his voice sounded so defeated, it was almost depressing.

"Road,"

 _Well, fuck._

* * *

They walked down the street, the two not-so-much brothers, earning themselves a few curious glance as they looked rather oddly.

"Ouch!" The child suddenly hissed, gripping his right arm tightly.

He scowled, rubbing it tenderly, causing the older of the two look in concern. "Does it hurt?" He ask, which is quite stupid since it was clearly visible that it hurts.

"It burns," The child stated through gritted teeth. "His innocence. . .it's overwhelming,"

"We're going to eliminate them tonight, so make sure it's healed by today," Tyki said, dropping onto his knees to inspect the shoulder.

"Pedo," Allen whispered, making Tyki sigh.

.

.

.

 _"But if so. . ." Nea muttered_ _mischievously, a sly grin stamped on his face. Allen backed away slowly._ _"I'm not going down alone!" The brunette lunged_ _at the_ _long-haired ginger, who shriek in_ _defiance a_ _s he tried to escape from his friend's grip._

 _"I'm not dying with you!" Allen shouted, pushing away the bloody rascal body. "Go die alone!"_

 _"Ahem," Someone cleared his throat, making both of the room occupant who was wrestling on the floor turned their attention towards the source of the voice._

 _Mana walker looked at them, the at the mess behind them, he stepped inside the room with his arm cross. Both of them paled miserably._

* * *

 **Omakae:**

"What is all this noise!" Cross Mariam bellowed as he stalked towards Nea's room. Knowing full well that it's all his fault that he was woken up at an ungodly hour.

What he did not expect was his older brother, along with Nea and what seems an enraged Mana, but he wasn't sure since Mana was acting rather peaceful. But by judging the terrified look on his brother and Nea's face he had just walked into a bad situation.

"Help me!" Allen pleaded.

He just snorted, leaning against the door way. "Why should I?"

"You-" Allen accused. "I don't remember raising you that way!"

"Of course you don't," Cross replied dryly. "You never raised me _that_ way,"

And with that he closed the door, leaving the two other occupant to their doom. After registering what happened, he went towards the kitchen. Better make himself a good cup of coffee while he's at it.

* * *

 **The fight's going to be next chapter if you'll wondering. Sorry for just stopping, I was rather busy juggling my time sine it was a busy week for me. But rest assured, I still have time to write this story since I have way to much time in my hand. Please comment or review, and if you want more situation like these, you can PM me or put it on the review.**

 **Bye! Thanks for reading!**


	13. Chapter 12: Battered body, Faded soul

**I can't help but dream of a world,**

 **That I know had long ceased to exist.**

 **But in the end, it's only my fantasy,**

 **And I have to wake to live my reality.**

* * *

 _Red._

That loathful color, that hateful color.

But no matter how spiteful it is, I can't help but love it.

"W- _what am I suppose to do. . .?"_ He sob, waiting for the _answer_ to come.

.

.

.

"I didn't know the _enemy_ sends children to fight?"

Allen snorted, he turned around and crossed his arm. Glaring at the stranger who ambushed his ambush.

"Like _you're_ any better," He hissed, silver eyes glaring at the enemy.

The enemy rummaged through his cloak and took out a book, it's metallic cover glinting in the moonlight. Allen _senses_ suddenly screamed, he gripped his knuckles tightly until he could feel warm liquid dripping from it. Though familiarity accompanied him as he recognize the tittle of the book anywhere.

"Who are you?" Allen ask, keeping an eye out for the book.

The stranger grinned smugly. "Nicholas," He said. "Nicholas Flamel,"

Using the blood from his palms, Allen drew a circle on his hand, writing symbols on it that resembles eerily of a child drawings. Which was not, by the way.

"So it's sorcerer against sorcerer?" He ask, quite amusing actually

"Hardly," Nicholas replied, opening his book. "I'm an alchemist,"

Allen grinned, he extended his hand forward and so did Nicholas, like a mirror image.

"Even better,"

 _"Ligabis!"_ They both said at the same time.

Allen manage to dodge at the right time before the innocence-powered spell reach him. He glared at Nicholas, who was perched up on the tree, he eyed at the book in his hands.

 _Of course he knows the book, it_ used _to be his._

"Procellae," Allen whispered.

And suddenly, all hell broke loose, trees unrooted from the earth, only the big and strong remained but their leaves have left them. All because of Allen's favourite spell.

"Ignis Tempus," Allen continued, watching as the whole surrounding area burst into flames. Fire rained down from the sky, like a beautiful firework show as a result of his words.

"Tempus Vernum," Nicholas said, who Allen just notice was still here. And water fall from the sky, raining heavily on them, the fire burned out and so did Allen's patience. Nicholas pointed a finger at Allen, scowling as he did so. "You sick, twisted child!" He hissed.

Allen grinned, his right hand put onto his chest as if motioning himself. "Me?" He said mockingly. "I'm hardly a child,"

The older teen gasped, the blood draining from his as he saw the symbol on Allen's hand. "Yo-You-"

"You see," Allen said, stepping forward as he did so. "Back in my days. . ."

"Sorcerer was the very definition of magic," He stretched his arms forward. "All types of them,"

 _"Scutum,"_

 _You can't stop me._

"Nihilum,"

 _Those who obstruct me from my path shall be_ annihilate.

.

.

.

"Nothing, Allen." Nea assured. "I-I keep it from everyone and take responsibility for it,"

 _"That title, I will take it,"_

* * *

Allen face distorted into a scowl as he hissed, dropping the book back onto the forest ground. Though it can't be called a forest anymore, thanks to his performace earlier. Pondering for a moment, he decided to take the book using his gloved, left hand. And with that he walked away from the land clearing, and headed back towards where he had promise to wait for Tyki.

"What-Who are you?"

Allen stopped in his track, turning his heal to face back. His blood turning cold as he saw the black cloaks and silver badges on the company that had spotted him.

"That book," One of them pointed out. "It's Nicholas,"

"It's mine," Allen growled, hugging the book even though it reacted badly with his skin. "I _wrote_ it,"

"You!" Their face contorted into pure rage.

Allen was not fast enough to dodge all the weapon that was unleashed at him at the same time. He looked down, a holy spear sprouting from his chest, near the injury that Cross had inflicted onto him.

"Noah!" They hissed.

Now golden eyes glared at them, like molten lava. His mouth distorted into a grin as it tasted the metallic liquid in his mouth.

 _Red. Red. Red._

Everything looks better in red, why not add some black for a change?

 _"Ambustum,"_

.

They wanted to _destroy_ him, to end his existence and lessen the enemy he will face.

But one thing they did not know, that _he_ was destruction.

You can't add fuel to a fire in hoping to extinguish it.

* * *

His breathing was shallow and it was so much hard to breathe. His chest was burning from the wound they gave him, his head was pounding, his heart was beating to fast. Fastfast _fast_ his head was spinning. Through the corner of his eyes, he saw someone coming closer and closer. Oh! he wanted to laugh at the irony, it was as if their roles have been switched.

He simply nodded solemnly at those words, even if he did not understand them. After a while, he felt himself being picked up and he let go of his battered conscious.

.

.

.

The grinning moon.

The scarred sky.

And the frozen lake.

.

He had never felt happier to be back here. In here, where he would never feel any pain, any sorts of misery. The only place where reality hadn't polluted, well maybe except his ark.

He was back here, in his black and white nightmare. The world of dreams and hopes that have long lost. Only promises remain.

"Stupid," He cursed, gripping his red hair tightly. "I let them see me," Wincing slightly over the pain he unleashed upon himself. And suddenly, exhaustion crept up to him like a ghost.

Allen looked back at the frozen lake, cracks ran on it's surface, like a gigantic spiderweb. _Stupid,_ he cursed his own stupidity for transforming, even if it was only partly.

He ran the surface with his hand, his innocence embed hand. The cracks smoothen out under it's touch.

"I wonder how much longer I have to stay here," he whispered to no one in particular. His bones felt heavy and his limbs felt worn out. "I'm tired, so tired."

"When can I finally rest,"

* * *

 **How was it? Good or bad, please review. If you have some questions, please ask and I will answer them. unless it's a spoiler or relevant to the plot. I want to surprise y'all.**

 **Most of you will think that my username is based on Allen, but actually it refers to my Wattpad account which is PJO and the number 14 is just my age. I just realize it and somehow, it felt like a wonderful coincidence. I'm thinking of changing the summary though, what do you think? Should I change or keep it.**


	14. Chapter 13: Yearning for Salvation

**Think of all the things we could have been,**

 **All the relationship we would've become;**

 **As brothers as cousins as a family.**

 **If only destiny was in our favour.**

* * *

 _"Hmm" Allen hummed, fiddling with the object in his hands._

 _"Judgement, huh?"_

.

.

.

"Goddamit!" He shouted, clawing his bandaged chest. _"Sano!"_

 _"Sano!"_ He shouted again, blood oozing through the bandage. But no matter how much he said, how much he cast the spell it would not heal.

 _"Consano!"_ Did he somehow use up all his magic, if that's the case he could simply use his lifeforce.

 _"Heal! Goddammit,"_ He cried at last, panting for air. It was no use, the innocence afflicted injury couldn't be healed using magic.

He didn't know why? After all, he was still a human with red blood running through his veins. No matter what entity that resided in him or what he was called in the past, he was still Humanhu _manhuman_. And if not, he wondered when he stop being one.

The door cried softly, along with an annoyed voice. "Oh- I just left you for three minutes and you injured yourself again!" someone said exasperated.

The footsteps came closer and there was a shift of the bed, making it known that someone else was on it. Allen scowled, ducking his hair curtained his face. White hair and grey skin, and obviously the golden eyes, it was surprising to see Allen in his other form for more than six hours. But one thing was missing, it was his _crown,_ his mark as one of the disciple. Unlike the new three-eyes newcomer, Tyki knows that Allen have it like the rest of them.

But Allen never transform fully and the others doesn't seem to be curious why.

Tyki sigh, running through his hair with his finger until finally releasing it. "Why weren't you at the place we promised yesterday?" He ask, his tone sounds almost accusing.

"I _was_ there Tyki," Allen hissed through his greeted teeth.

"You were ten blocks away Allen!" Tyki said exasperated, putting his hands in the air to add the affect.

"Well sorry!" Allen growled, though it sounded sincere and a bit sarcastic to the other.

"The Earl's angry and it literally took me a country to make sure Road and Sheryl doesn't get to see you," Tyki continued, sounding tired as he did so.

Allen finally look up to see the other teen, who know look so tired, so old. Allen truly pitied him. "I'm sorry, Joi- Tyki," A simple slip of the tongue, a honest mistake. But Tyki look at him, a sad smile adorned his face as he realised Allen mistake. And for a second, Allen saw the shadow of the past, of a family he once knew.

Slowly, Tyki rise up, ruffling Allen's hair for one last time before walking towards the door. "Goodbye. I'll see you tomorrow," He said before closing the door.

Allen waited to see Tyki's presence disappeared. He sigh, looking down onto his hands, his bloody hands as it was coated by his own blood. Contemplating on something, Allen finally decided;

"I fucked up, badly," And with that, he bury his head into his hand, not caring that it would stain his face later. And moments later, pain washed over him.

* * *

"Ahaha," He breathed, gripping his head more tightly. " _Haaa **HaHaHaHAHAHAA!"**_

" _iT hUrts. . .Make it Stop,"_ Pleading, begging, he only wished for the pain to stop.

"Stop, _sto **P, S** t **o**_ _P"_ He repeated over and over like a broken disk. As he finally stop, throat pulsing in pain, Allen finally cried. Letting tears fall as his dam of emotion finally broke.

"Ple _ase_!" He pleaded, voice breaking at the end. And slowly, he breathe, feeling his lung with it's well-needed oxygen. But the pain never diminished, in fact, it seems to intensify with every second.

"Mana. . ." He called weakly, hoping that someone would come to rescue him. "Nea, Cross, Toraido, Joido, Dezaiasu ,Wisely. . ."

"Fiidora, Maashiima , Raasura , Road. . . Bondomu, Rasutoru, Maitora. . ."

It was no use, they're gone (Not all of them) but still. . .

"Calling them won't make them come back, you know," Someone said.

Allen snapped his eyes open, looking at the intruder. Golden eyes glowed eerily and behind her, was the full moon, her figure casting ominous shadow on the floor; _Road_. Allen didn't reply, but instead, choose to stare at her. Anything that could distract him from _this_ pain.

Road stepped forward, looming over Allen who was curled up in a ball. She went down to her knees so she can see Allen eye to eye, and gently caressed his hair. A simple melody was hummed, and Allen found himself immersed in it. The pain didn't lessen though.

"We could hear it Allen," Road whispered, her golden eyes keep starring at him. Searching, searching. . .

But can never find what _they_ want.

"Your cries. . ." She said in a soft tone, as if any higher would leave the child in a emotion mess. (Which was debatable)

"You shouldn't play like that," Road said suddenly, gripping his hair tightly causing the younger disciple to wince. "Transformation is no joke Allen, it's unleashing sacred power onto _yourself_ and using it as _yours_ ,"

Eyes like ice, she held her gaze with his. "It's either all or none," She said and finally released his hair.

Road stood up and instead of leaving, she propped herself besides Allen. Resting her elbows on her thigh and put her head on it. "I can't help you lessen the pain. . ." She said slowly, sounding bored. "But this will be a lesson to you,"

"It hurts Road," Allen sobbed, he didn't know what hurts anymore. Everything hurts, all his cell was screaming, sending out pain impulses to his mind. It was too much, his nerves was haywired and it didn't help to reduce the pain, but amplify it by sending distress message to the brain.

"I know Allen," Road said. "I also been through it before," Her voice broke at the end.

Allen shouted and Road sung to calm down the child. In the end it became a tear mess, with Allen screaming and thrashing and Road at some point crying. After a long time, Allen finally calm down, already used to the pain. While Road sat at a chair across him, deciding that observing him was the best she could do.

His breathe was shallow, his heart was pounding heavily, Allen was sure it could be heard across the whole manor. And finally, the blissful numbness that always accompanies pain finally filled him up, making everything far more bearable, that is until the dull aching of the limb was only pain left.

"Hey Allen," He heard Road saying somewhere in his suffering. "Can you sing me a song."

Allen was quite for a while, thinking of her request. "The lord Millennium is in search for you. . ." Allen sung weakly, his mind already formed the next verse. "Looking for the Heart now. Have you heard the news?"

"Maybe you stole it from him? I'll see if it's true. . ."

"I was not the one he sought, Maybe it is you. "

"Who is it who has _my_ heart. . .?"

"I will find _you_ soon! "

Allen doesn't know if he got to finish his song, because that next thing he knew he was already asleep. Dreaming of his nightmarish past even though Road tried to lighten it for him, it was still hellish.

"That's what you get for messing with memories," He heard Road sigh, somewhere in his dreams.

.

.

.

 _"Here!" Allen said, handing the weapon to Cross who was giving him a dumbfounded look._

 _Allen sigh, contemplating how stupid his younger brother could be at some times. "It's a gift idiot!" He said exasperated and shove the pistol in his brother hand._

 _Cross eyed the pistol wearily, then back at Allen. "What's the catch?" He ask, making Allen roll his eyes._

 _"Make sure to protect yourself," Allen said before leaving a bewildered Cross in his room. As he steps out, Allen couldn't help but smirk._

He was such a _great_ brother.

* * *

"I forgotten your abilities to fuck things up," Allen snorted at that statement but didn't denied it.

Allen gave an amusing glance at Tyki, who just bothered to change his bandage instead of last night. He smirked at seeing the disgusted scowl on Tyki's face.

"You just had to touch it," Tyke stated, now studying the wound that have worsened overnight.

"It hurts," Allen tried to defend himself. Thanks to his earlier episode, Allen couldn't feel the pain anymore but instead numbness.

Tyki sigh, washing away the dried blood with a wet cloth. "I'm _Destruction_ remember, not healer or something like that," Allen continued, wincing when Tyki burrowed his nails into Allen's chest, making it bleed. Thankfully his superior gene immediately patched it up, but Innocence-made wound? Not gonna happen.

Tyki ignored his hiss of pain and continued washing the wound, he glared at the stitches that some had opened. But thankfully had closed so Tyki doesn't have to sew it back. And finally he bandaged it with a long roll of clean, white cloth. Experience told him that normal bandage would just tore up the next four hour.

"There," Tyki exclaimed, as he tied the last knot. He stood up and ruffled Allen already-messed hair, giving him a grin as he did that.

"Don't do anything _stupid,_ I'm going to take your breakfast," Tyke said as he walked towards the door.

"Hurry Tyki!" Allen shouted. "I'm hungry!"

As Allen was left alone with his thought, Allen couldn't help but wonder; How the past and the current reincarnation are almost similar in certain aspect.

* * *

 **Good? Bad? Confusing? I'm sorry, I'm so tired and sleepy, plus my mind is giving me a killer headache (Guess what inspired this chapter?). The new chapter for the Siren AU is finished but I'm so lazy to update it. My senior have hair like Allen, this year she is going to have one of the biggest exam in her student life so because of stress some of it turned grey. I pity her but then I look at me hair, which is an abomination. I'm just tired and all, but it's our well earned holiday, hopefully this can reduce my stress.**

 **Bye! Good Night from me!**


	15. AN: Don't worry, I'm not leaving this

**A/N: Hai! Thank you all for reading this far and did not give up on this story. And thank you for your constant reviews, I laugh a little when i read pinkdog16 review and thought, this is my story when my brain is not on drugs so why not write it when it's on drug. And I finally decided to take my meds, the one I've been ignoring for a month. My memory is blurry from time to time so I usually don't know what's going on with this story but aware of it's plot so that's why it's chaotic, quote "This is a pinball machine and the plot/ball is going all over" . I have to wait for four days for the meds to settle down so the next time I'll be updating will be around next week. The medicine will help me with my memory.**

 **I'm also planning to make a highschool AU but I have many different plot about it but it's base on pairing so please tell me which pairing you prefer;**

 **-Neallen**

 **-Poker Pair**

 **-Laven**

 **-Roallen**

 **It's not going to be romance but it's plot rotation revolves around it, more like Brotp instead of OTP. I prefer Neallen since there's little to no Neallen highschool AU but like I said, it's for reader to decided and the author to follow. I also ship them mostly, Neallen being my number one and the rest following a numeric order.**

 **-Bye! Stalk you later. (Since I stalk all of you that review or favourite/follow or both, my story) **


	16. Chapter 14: The Brewing Disaster

**My? My? My?**

 **You naughty child,**

 **You created your own demise.**

* * *

A torrent of curses exited his mouth as the young boy starred at his homework with a look of pure disgust. Ever since the event that lead Allen to repeatedly getting injured by exorcists two month ago, he was now home schooled.

At first it was pure bliss, spending time in the Earl's mansion without a care in the world, doing whatever he wants; creating new spell and potion now and then. (He was as bad as Komui, sometimes worse) But it soon turned into a nightmare when the Earl decided he needed to catch up with kids his age and give him loads of homework, more than what school does.

Speaking of homework, he was currently doing history; a six long paragraph of the British Revolution.

Allen wondered, how does the Bookman Clan didn't go insane with this much of history, but he realized that they were also not the sanest people on Earth. Sometimes, they were even on par with the Noah, which is a lot, Allen in particular once experienced it when he created the theory of bounded souls and gotten a personal visit from the clan itself. They were sleep deprived zombies with caffeine as their fuel.

Groaning for the upteenth time today, Allen finally gave up, there were too much figures, too much _things_ that happen. Why does British keep trying to expand their- Wait? He's Britain.

As if he already given up,(which he does) Allen starred at the window yearningly. Even though it was raining outside, Allen couldn't help but been drawn to it. The outside world and not his room, doing homework. He couldn't help but feel jealous of Road that even though there's human, she got to go to school, _outside._

He was going insane wasn't he? Staying in the manor for almost three months straight, it was as if the Earl was imprisoning him here.

And with that, feeling determination running through his brain.

A decision was made.

* * *

A cry of delight escape his mouth as he felt the torrent of wind passing through him, like a stampeding horses. Allen was wrong, slightly wrong, it wasn't raining, there was a storm. And he was in it, enjoying it to it's fullest.

The winds was crying, the sky was shouting, electricity lighting up the sky and harsh, cold rain beating down onto him. And Allen couldn't have it any other way. This was nature running it's course, and a sorcerer like him, has to stay in tune with it as he draw powers from it.

 _Higher_

He urged his limbs to climb faster, the tree he was latched on swaying from time to time, as if it would collapse. But he have no worries, Allen picked a sturdy tree, with strong root and thick barks, an old but young oak tree, just outside the Earl's residence.

 _Higher_

Allen flinched as lighting over lightning came down, and following behind it was the echoes of thunder. But still, he continued his journey to the peak of the trees, as fast as his short leg could carry him.

Allen cried, but not of happiness this time but of fear as a pillar of electricity not so much appeared not far for him. Okay, climbing a tree in the middle of a storm might not be the brightest idea he had yet but it wasn't the worst, for one example, soul transfer.

And with renewed determination that at least he wouldn't die in vain, Allen continued to climb, using the thick branches as a support. The ground already far below him as he was on par with the fifth level of a building.

The winds picked up again, and Allen yelped, hugging the trunk for his dear life. He gulped, starring up and now he knew, he was near already. So he climbed a bit more and as he was finally at the top, he immediately regretted it.

It was a beautiful sight to say the least, but one thing he deadpanned on was that Paris was far more breathtaking when he was in the air, if you ignored the fact that he almost falled to his death.

The Earl mansion, not extravagant like the other noble mansion but was till spectacular enough to be called so, stood with all it's might against the storm. And if he concentrate enough, he could just see his room, at the second floor with it's window open and his homework drenched in rain.

Allen turned his impending attention to a carriage drawing near, who he recognize the one he use to rode to school and back from school, sometimes along with Road and Wisely if they stay at the Earls. But since he stopped going to school, the Earl had stopped calling the carriage to pick him up unless. . .

Allen squinted his eyes, focusing on the occupant inside the carriage. And just his luck, he could see Road and her adoptive brother Wisely, chatting happily as if they aren't planning to wipe out humanity. Which they are not at the current moment.

But Allen wondered, why are they coming here? Maybe they're staying at the Earl's at the current moment, and if so, surely Tyki would come to.

To be honest, now is not the time to celebrate, he had to go back to his room now, since no one was aware he was outside, and in a storm now less. And unlike a certain _sibling_ of his, he doesn't have the ability to fly so he opted for the traditional way, he climbed down.

The process of climbing down was a lot more harder than the process of climbing up. When he was climbing up, nature seem so beautiful to him, breathtaking it was as if they became on terms, but now when he was climbing down, it was as if the whole universe was against him.

With the winds picking up suddenly, and occasionally he sould slip and some branches were to weak to support his weight. Also not to mention Road spotted him, well it was a brief eye-contact but her violet eyes flashed gold for a brief moment when their eyes lock, so yeah. He was spotted.

"Quoting Tyki, "Your ability to fuck up astounds me.'" Allen grumbled under his breathe, watching as the ground comes closer to him and yet, still far away. "Me too, Tyki. Me too,"

 _I am also astound by my ability to fuck up, in all possible way._

If Sheryl were here, he would flaunt all over him, saying that a child of his age shouldn't swear. Well he usually tell the prime minister that back then, children younger than him swears all the time.

 _Crack_

That was the sound the branch made when Allen stepped on it, thankfully Allen manage to stop in time before it break completely. Now stuck, Allen observe the other branches around him, figuring out the best route he should take. And finally decided, Allen leaned towards the left, trying to transfer to another branch and with the agility of a performer and he leaped-

 _Boom_

That was the sound that followed with blinding white, Allen felt his heart leaped when he too fall down. He screamed as he fall like a fruit, the branches breaking as he tumbled down. Until finally, he stopped, his back aching when he not so much landed softly on the ground. _Crack-_

That was definitely the sound of something breaking. And this time it was not a branch.

Allen glared at the culprit, as it positioned weirdly on the ground. Clearly broken, and now, Allen had no way of walking back to the manor. "You just had to break?!" He question angrily at the leg.

The leg did not reply, and instead remained silent.

Yup, Allen was going crazy but was he sane to begin with?

To be honest, it would be much easier to shift into his black form and let his gene fix the leg but unfortunately, Allen didn't want to repeat the memory suppression problem he had a few months ago. After all, he was still getting migraine for it.

And now, Allen felt utterly miserable, with the rain coming down on him as if it was mocking him, and the cries of thunder and along with the few occasion when the sky would lit up, buzzing with energy. Allen was sad, miserable, malcontent, if he never exited his room then this wouldn't happen, he wouldn't have fallen from a tree, broke his leg-

 _Achoo_

He sneezed. Great! Now he have a cold. Could this day get any better.

"Allen! _Allen!"_ While he was wallowing in misery, Allen did not notice someone calling him so when he heard it, he immediately cried out and thankful that someone came to save him.

"Allen?" He starred at the confusing state of the Earl, clearly wondering why the boy was on the ground. Probably also wondering why he was outside to begin with.

"Help me," He pleaded and raised his hands up as if asking to be carried.

The Earl understood his message and immediately bend down to pick him up. Allen sigh in relief, now that he was under the protection of Lero, protected by the rain.

He sneezed again, suddenly feeling cold. The Earl chuckled and handed Allen his handkerchief from his breast pocket, Allen took it eagerly, aching for something dry at the moment.

"You always caused me trouble, don't you, Fourteenth?" The Earl said, using a tone that one would use at a child.

Allen scoffed and turned his head, he crossed his arms across his chest and puffed his cheek. "No I don't," He denied, casing for the man to chuckle again.

'It's cold. Lero!" The umbrella complains, causing for it to be scold by the Earl.

"Oh, hush Lero! Umbrellas aren't suppose to talk!"

* * *

 **Haha. I think I'm getting better, but sometime short-term memories would lapse together so give my a week. I'm planning to make it slow at the moment and before this, I reread my story which made me cringe. My writing style keep changing so I have to pick one, I'm still testing a few things at the moment.**

 **One more thing, don't trust what I say when I'm in a delirious state. I don't know which one I should write. The highschool AU? Bookman apprentice (Red/Allen) Au? or Noah's Project AU?**

 **Clearly I'm not planning to write all tree at the same time so I'll let you readers decided.**

 **Well then, stalk you later!**


	17. DN: Not The End

**Doctors Note**

 **A/N: My doctor is angry at me because I been neglecting my medicine for a month, he also gave me sleeping pills since I have trouble getting to sleep. He's mad but he wanted to see the difference between me without medicine and with medicine so it since I have to edit this story, and recreate it from scratch. I would be remaking it from Chapter 6:Curiosity killed the cat, and the plot would change from there. I'm sincerely sorry but I have some memory problem, heck I didn't even remember making the last five chapter, everything began grogging and my memory kept lapsing.**

 **It's probably weird why this story is the only one with problem? The Don't Stop, It's our duet was written with the help of my psychiartrist (Did I spell it correctly) He's also in the comunity that's why we agreed to write about it, and he's not much of a Percy Jackson fan so, yeah. Back to the topic, he said he wanted the story to be done by the end of this month, not done End but more like I fininsh recreating it by the end of this month. All on my own, with no one helping me so yeah.**

 **The medicine is acting well enough, making my mind a little bit clearer but everythimg is acting a bit too fast. And it's hard to remember event that just happened so unless it worsen I would be updating like I usually do next week. And again I'm sorry for everything that I wrote, I know that everything is confusing but I try explaining it with another Authors Note.**

 **-Bye! Hopefully I'll be writing again next week. Sorry for all the spelling mistakes 3**


	18. Answers Given, hopefully

**For you, my dear,**

"I **give a thousand of memories.**

 **Before I bid my goodbye.**

* * *

 _"Mana's going to kill you," Allen says as he takes a long sip from his coffee, his eyes trained on the wreckage that'd made him waking up in the first place._

 _"No, he'll not," Neah replied glumly, standing there besides Allen as his tired eyes glanced disinterestedly upon his room. "But, beat me into a pulp: Yes," He continued just as enthusiastically._

* * *

 ** _Red_**

 _That loathful colour, that hateful colour._

 _But no matter how spiteful it is, I can't help but love it._

 _"W-what am I supposed to do?" He sobbed, waiting for the answer to come._

* * *

 _"What are you going to do now, Allen?" A mirage of his past ask, of midnight hair and starlight eyes._

"Allen?" he muttered to himself, quietly and insanely, he was alone in his room. "Allen. _Allen._ Red. Neah." he counts it on his fingers, one by one.

"Which one am I?" his heart clenches and all the things that he wants is to cry to the world, melting back into the sky, but all he could do was quiet sobbing through gritted teeth.

"Someone please answer me. . ." he muttered, clenching his shirt. No. No. I don't understand anymore, who am I?

 _"I don't know, Neah," the gentle figure says, his mouth twitching into a smile ever so slightly, bewitching and alluring knight and princes just like a witch he is. And he too, was the same._

 ** _Am I Red? Red. . ._**

 ** _Red!_**

 ** _That hateful child, h-he killed Mana._**

 ** _Mana died because of him. A child that never laugh. A crowd that Mana hate._**

 ** _That child. . .I absolutely loath him. . .And so. . .I killed him upon the old graveyard, finally being a child that Mana love._**

 ** _But Mana was dead upon that snowing day. He died again, and there's no chance of he ever coming back. That child, he should had never existed, shouldn't he?_**

* * *

Allen, _Allen. . .Allen. . .if not Red then I am Allen. A friend that had loved his family the most, the four of them were his family and one by one they went away._

 _Cross was the first to leave, feeling the building frustration of the increasing rate of Mana's Family. He left to accomplish his dream, but he never returned even after all the years he waited._

 _Mana. . .Mana was the second to fall. He retreated one night, leaving behind a dying Neah. It was his fault, he should had been there when that had happen. If- If this continues then he will loose family._

 _"I can't bear it anymore. . .Neah. . .please. . .you're all I have. . ."_

 _ **Neah. . .**_

 _ **Neah?**_

 _ **Mana's precious, most dearest Neah. The beloved.**_

 _ **Oh. . .that Neah. . .even in the past he was well loved.**_

 _ **I can't help but feel** **jealous. He can't be 'Allen' and he can't be Neah.**_

 _ **They were all to precious to be him.**_

* * *

"If I'm not them then who am I?" he growled, gripping his hair in a mess of tangled hair. Changing and unchanging his form.

Allen. . .the moment of realization came to him in a heartbeat. He was not them, no, they were far too preacious for him to be.

"I am Allen. . ." Simply Allen. "The child that loves Mana, the most,"

It was unfair really, for Mana to search past him, in search of a brother who wants to destroy him. Truly unfair really, after all, compared to Neah, he was well deserve of Mana's love and affection.

He smiles. Trying to smile just like how Neah had smiled back then, and with that, he ran into the hallway, in search of his dearest Earl.

At the library he came, and upon a single heartbeat of the sight of that man, he ran towards him as fast as his little leg can carry, and no doubt it took him some time to cover the distance. The Earl noticed him and put down his book, he smiles, that all too familiar heart-wrenching smile that build up too much burden on his emotion. This man right now was Mana no doubt, cause unlike his other predecessor, he was the only one with glazed eyes each time it was on him. But then again, he could be wrong and tiptoeing on this is hard so he won't call that name, if he was wrong then it will cause all sorts of trouble.

"Earl," the child cried out in joy, jumping forward to be enveloped by the warm hug.

He doesn't care actually, as long as there's still Mana

* * *

 **Umm. . .I hope this answers your question. Kind of.**

 **With deep uncertainty,**

 **Mana**


	19. Finale

I would like to say sorry for every wrong that I had done. I am deleting this account.


	20. A message for my dearest readers

**Hi guys, I guess I have a lot of explaining to do.**

 **I'm so sorry for wasting your time on this, but please hear me out.**

 **I'm fine**

 **Though not as much as I would like to be.**

 **I'm so sorry for leaving just like that, but things went wrong way to fast and in the end I wasn't able to handle it.**

 **I never like burdening my family so I been neglecting myself a lot, I never ate my meals and only took some toast and my supplement since time was gold and I can't waste them. I paid my own fees so I used my allowance and saved them, in the end I didn't ate at school also. And I silently took jobs behind them back and actually spent more than 15 hours at school. . . so BAM! My diet was gone.**

 **Then my sister came up, we had been on the verge of bankruptcy to pay for my sister's medical fees. But now that it's over we got a lot of leftovers of stuff and my parents became depressed. I didn't want to make them even more worried so I just handled my own problem. It's sad, but it's in the past so I didn't let my feelings take over.**

 **And to be honest, you could say I'm a piano person. But now I hate it, I can't even listen to my own playing now.**

 **And then school, co academics, international programs, concerts.**

 **I can't focus on anything in my life at that point, I was still sad about the lost of my younger sister. . .**

 **But I can't continue on being like some depressed teen so I decided to forgot everything and only remember what's important.**

 **So yeah. . .**

 **To be honest I may not be the same person who once wrote all of this stories, but I'll try my best to continue what I left.**

 **The current me doesn't like half-assed effort so I'm actually angry as I'm writing this.**

 **But again, I'm sorry, extremely so. Please forgive me. I'm so sorry.**

 **Just give me time, let me recollect the past, I won't abandon anything anymore.**

 **I'm so sorry. Maybe I update tomorrow or the next day, but all I'm asking is time and forgiveness.**

 **Please bear in mind that when I said I decided to forgot anything, I meant it.**

 **My teenage life, gone, just by a single decision.**

 **So hahaha, I screwed up. Look at me, I'm a mess.**

 **I'm so sorry, please forgive me.**


	21. A message for my dearest reader

**Hi guys, I guess I have a lot of explaining to do.**

 **I'm so sorry for wasting your time on this, but please hear me out.**

 **I'm fine**

 **Though not as much as I would like to be.**

 **I'm so sorry for leaving just like that, but things went wrong way to fast and in the end I wasn't able to handle it.**

 **I never like burdening my family so I been neglecting myself a lot, I never ate my meals and only took some toast and my supplement since time was gold and I can't waste them. I paid my own fees so I used my allowance and saved them, in the end I didn't ate at school also. And I silently took jobs behind them back and actually spent more than 15 hours at school. . . so BAM! My diet was gone.**

 **Then my sister came up, we had been on the verge of bankruptcy to pay for my sister's medical fees. But now that it's over we got a lot of leftovers of stuff and my parents became depressed. I didn't want to make them even more worried so I just handled my own problem. It's sad, but it's in the past so I didn't let my feelings take over.**

 **And to be honest, you could say I'm a piano person. But now I hate it, I can't even listen to my own playing now.**

 **And then school, co academics, international programs, concerts.**

 **I can't focus on anything in my life at that point, I was still sad about the lost of my younger sister. . .**

 **But I can't continue on being like some depressed teen so I decided to forgot everything and only remember what's important.**

 **So yeah. . .**

 **To be honest I may not be the same person who once wrote all of this stories, but I'll try my best to continue what I left.**

 **The current me doesn't like half-assed effort so I'm actually angry as I'm writing this.**

 **But again, I'm sorry, extremely so. Please forgive me. I'm so sorry.**

 **Just give me time, let me recollect the past, I won't abandon anything anymore.**

 **I'm so sorry. Maybe I update tomorrow or the next day, but all I'm asking is time and forgiveness.**

 **Please bear in mind that when I said I decided to forgot anything, I meant it.**

 **My teenage life, gone, just by a single decision.**

 **So hahaha, I screwed up. Look at me, I'm a mess.**

 **I'm so sorry, please forgive me.**


	22. Auhtir note

Sorry guys, I burnt my fingers from my dominant hand, and it hurts soI think I won't be able to update this week. Sorry.


	23. HELP ME PLEASE

**For most of you who don't know. I have my ABRSM grade 6 piano exam this year and me being me, I lost the CD that came with the book. If there are reader out there, who have the CD for the 2017-2018 exam, can you please share it with me.** **You can put the CD in your laptop and play it, and since most of the laptops are advanced this days you can copy paste it to a new file and attach it to e-mail. If any of you want to help me please PM me or comment. I really need your help, now that I lost the CD I can't really play it.** **Please. And thank you.**


	24. Goodbye

So it seems this is the second time I'm leaving. I'm heartbroken really, seeing as I had enjoyed this site very much. But I can't continue on writing anymore. I'm don't have a lot of time to write anymore and I think it's best if I leave, you might see me commenting on stories from time to time.

I'm really thankful for all you user who jad supported me from my very first update until the end. And I'm very thankful to those who had read and liked my story. And above all, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for leaving like this again and I'm sorry for my stories that I'll never finnish.

Thanks you,

Mana


End file.
